"oh shut the fuck up! you expect me to believe that?" vinnie stood there in shock, taking in my words. he got real quiet. his face was flushed. "i don't know how to make it better.." he looked down at his feet talking really quiet. my heart ached even more. all i wanted to do was grab him and hold him and tell him it's ok and we can just forget about it. but it wasn't right.
"just answer one question for me v." he looked up. "why wasn't i good enough?" a single tear left my eye and dripped down my cheek. i stared at his blank teary eyed face. i examined him one last time before i just walked out of our bedroom and out the front door.
i got myself a hotel and didn't come home that night, despite all of the messages from him telling me he was worried. i spent my night at the hotel bar. "he really cheated huh?" i stirred around my double gin and tonic with the thin plastic black straw. i watched the lime sink. "sounds like it sweetheart." the pretty bartender lady said. i later found out her name was jessie. she kept the bar open all night just to talk to me. she ended up sitting and having drinks with me when the bar was technically supposed to be closed.
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"you think i should answer his messages?" i looked at her. "maybe just to tell him you're safe. it's up to you babe." i took another gulp of my drink. "it just feels like this huge piece of me is missing." she nodded. "my girlfriend cheated on me too. i know how it feels." i turned to her. "ex girlfriend?" "haha nope. she's my current girlfriend." she took a gulp of her drink. "so you stayed with her?" she just nodded while taking another drink.
"i loved her too much. so we figured it out. it took a lot of time but we did it. now we're getting married in 3 months." i raised my eyebrows at her. "people you love are always going to disappoint you. everyone makes bad mistakes. the only thing that matters is if they're willing to deal with the consequences and if they're willing to fix how it destroyed you." i teared up. "so we still have a chance?"
she laughed softly and smooth. "that depends if he's a shitty person. i mean did you ever think he'd hurt you? has he ever done anything else to break your trust?" "no. never. he's such a sweetheart." she nodded. "you just have to make sure he knows that this behavior is intolerable and even though you're taking him back, doesn't mean he's allowed to abuse your niceness." she was so fucking wise.
jessie had given me probably the best life advice anyone had ever given me, and we had just met. i didn't answer him that night. i stayed at the hotel for a little over three days.
vinnie's pov
i laid on her side of the bed. i didn't move and soaked in my thoughts. she wasn't answering my messages or calls. most of her stuff was here and i was extremely worried about her. she turned her location off and everything. i knew she would freak out but i didn't think she'd leave and not tell me she was ok.
