✓ BETS & BROKEN HEARTS | JAY

21 - I Hate You

Areum knocked on the door as she shouted Y/N's name. "Y/N, open the door!" She said and sighed when the door remained closed. 

Y/N's grandmother stood there, uneasy, worried, confused. 

Her granddaughter came back home crying her eyes out before she walked into her room and violently slammed the door closed. Only her cries were heard as she locked herself in, letting her grandmother painfully listen to her.

Areum lowered her head before she looked at Y/N's grandmother, slowly shaking her head, letting her know that there was nothing they could do other than wait for her.

As Areum was about to walk down the stairs, the sound of the lock opening made her stop in her tracks before she quickly turned around.

There she was, looking as lifeless as a stone. 

Y/N's grandmother looked at her with eyes full of worry as her eyes glistened, the tears about to fall on her cheeks. Never in her life, she saw her granddaughter in such a state. 

So weak, so heartbroken.

Areum's eyes softened as she slowly walked back up and stood in front of Y/N, smiling weakly at her. Y/N's throat tightened as she took a short intake of breath. Her eyes welled up with tears before she engulfed Areum in a tight hug, not able to hold the heartbreak any longer. 

Areum patted Y/N's back and caressed her hair as she silently listened to her cries. "It's gonna be okay." She whispered before closing her eyes, feeling something in her break into pieces.

Y/N's grandmother watched them as the tears she tried so hard to hold already found their way on her cheeks. Wiping them off, she sighed and slowly walked away as she knew Y/N would be better with Areum.

After she calmed down, Y/N sat on the chair next to her window and stared out of the window at the grey sky. She hugged her knees to her chest and sat there, numb and emotionless.

"The sky is sad," Areum said as she stood next to her. "Just like your eyes." 

Sobs left Y/N's lips as she turned to Areum and stared at her with tearing eyes. 

"I-" She choked out and breathed heavily. "I d-don't know what t-to do-" She said and closed her eyes. "W-why did h-he... why d-did he do t-that?" She asked as she looked back at Areum with broken eyes. 

Areum sighed before hugging her. "I don't know, Y/N... I don't know why." She said as she patted Y/N's back. "All I know is that he's an asshole for what he did to you... and he doesn't deserve you crying over him."

Y/N sighed and wiped her tears before putting her head on her arms. "It felt real." She whispered.

"What?" Areum asked when she couldn't hear her clearly.

"Our love... it felt so real." Lifting her head, her red eyes landed on the empty paper on her desk; the paper she was so excited to fill with colors and hearts, and yet now, all she could think of is a black lifeless painting. 

"But it was just a lie... all along."

   . . .

The next morning Y/N headed to school with a single piece of paper in her hand. The paper that she spent all night on painting. And it was the only thing that made her face her fears and go meet him. 

All eyes were on her as she walked down the hallways. Maybe it was because of how weak she looked, and how broken she was. 

As she kept on walking, she knew that the only place Jay would be at was the rooftop. Other than the memories they made there, it was his favorite place. And that thought made her realize how much she knew him, and how much she started hating it.

Y/N stopped once she reached her destination, sighing heavily before she took another step forward. 

There he was, staring at the sky as the gentle morning breeze played with his hair. He looked so peaceful and breathtaking that Y/N's eyes started watering before she quickly wiped them off.

How dare he look like that when she was trying so hard to hate him?

Jay slowly turned his head once he felt someone's presence with him, widening his eyes at the sight of the girl he loved; the girl that he regretted breaking her heart. 

And just by seeing her eyes, all the guilt that he tried to ignore rushed over him. 

Once again.

Standing up from his seat, he walked to her with the cold expression he finally mastered. He knew he had to hurt her to protect her. 

Because that was the only way.

"What are you doing here?" He asked before he closed his eyes and sighed. 

Anger, guilt, sadness, longing... all the feelings rushed over him when a tear escaped her red eyes and fell on her cheek.

Y/N slammed the paper on his chest before he grabbed it and stared at it in confusion. It was a paper painted with pure black, not a single sight of white on it.

"What's this-"

"My feelings for you," Y/N said, making Jay's shoulders drop. But what was he exactly waiting for after hurting her?

"Hate, resentment, loathing..." She stopped and stared at him right in the eyes. "Those are my true feelings for you." She paused before she looked away and said the words that stabbed Jay's heart like knives,

"I hate you, Park Jay."

And with that, Y/N walked away. 

Not noticing Jay's weak smile, nor the single tear that found its way down his cheek.