Longing •Bucky Barnes•

45. Keep Your Enemies Close

Bucky and I had talked a little bit before he had to leave to go see Bruce for the night. He knew the gist of what had happened, but I knew I was going to have to tell him everything. He had convinced me to let him come when I went to go speak with Sam this morning. I wasn't a huge fan of the idea but after lying the way I did I wasn't going to argue. Sam would be in for a surprise but it's the least I could do.

Morgan had a dance camp we had signed her up for so I had taken her early this morning and I would pick her up later this afternoon. I had a long sleepless night because not only was I alone, but I was in a lot of pain. I woke up to my bruises being considerably darker. It reminded me a little of how I looked when I first came here after Tony had found me. It wasn't a pleasant memory so I moved away from it and the mirror as quickly as I could.

I was making coffee when I heard the front door open. Bucky came in looking a little better than usual. Most mornings he looked exhausted and today he didn't look so wiped. He turned to me as he hung us his jacket and I instantly walked over and wrapped my arms around him. I finally got the sense of calmness I had been missing since he had left late last night.

"How'd you sleep?" He asked me in a tired voice.

"I didn't, you?" I asked him as I laid my head on his chest.

"Neither did I." He said squeezing me softly.

We stood there for a long moment before we finally separated. We sat and drank some coffee and I dozed off for a short while on the couch. I woke to him telling me it was time to go meet with Sam. I wasn't exactly excited to talk about our fuck up but I was worried what the next step would be.

We made our way to the meeting room quietly but I was at least at peace with the fact that we were okay. It was rare I saw Bucky upset, but he was furious with me yesterday. Understandably so, but it didn't make it any easier to deal with. I had so many worries about what was going to happen but there wasn't much I could do about it. If I was needed to take down the FlagSmashers I was going to do it.

Maybe it was the sense of guilt I had about my days at HYDRA. I felt an overwhelming sense of guilt to do something good as if I was trying to make up for it. I had been a horrible person, obviously beyond my control, but it only made the weight on my back heavier. I took personal responsibility for problems I didn't create. I simply could not turn my back on helping someone or stopping someone who needed to be stopped. It was an unfortunate mindset I had but I supposed there could be worse.

"Hey Val- Bucky?" I heard as we walked into the meeting room. I could see Sam's shock but his shoulders fell realizing he had lied to his friend too.

"Sam, I see you guys went on a joy ride." He said and Sam smiled shamefully.

"Yeah, I take it you heard." Sam said placing his hands on his hips. He slid me a bag and I knew it was a bagel.

"To a degree, catch me up." Bucky said sitting down.

Sam looked to him with hesitation but eventually sat down. I followed as well and sat down feeling a little better than I did yesterday. While it came with few perks, healing abnormally fast was an added bonus. Sam pulled out a tablet and showed us a video of us the other day fighting. I turned away seeing it was clearly taken on the helicopter that John had come out of. I turned away not wanting to see it anymore.

"Super soldier's, you weren't kidding." Bucky said after a moment.

"Yeah, and I'm worried about how many more they may have." Sam said shaking his head. "After this and their attack in London and this we can count at least 12 super soldiers."

"Yeah that's a concerning number, but I'm more concerned on where they got 12 syringes of serum." Bucky said and I finally looked back towards them.