Resurrect Me (Book 1)

22 - Epilogue

I've come a long way. Happiness isn't something I need to find in death anymore. Pain isn't the only thing that brings me joy. I find it in the small things. Like right now.

I lay leaned up against Gray with Cormac snuggling in between my legs. Theon sits on the other side of Gray and is holding him close. Kieran and Heath are cuddled up on the other couch. We're currently watching another cliche horror movie but it was nice just spending time with these guys. They made me feel things I never knew were possible. I could now honestly say I loved them.

It been almost three months since I was sent here and these have been the best months of my life. I have already admitted to my feeling and they all returned the same. Which made me feel ecstatic.

The night I first indulged in Kierans kink was the night i realized I somewhat shared it. I hadnt slept with him that day but we did go pretty far. He had even given me oral after he licked blood from cuts on my thighs. It was an exhilarating time. The next time we did it though did end up in sex. With me on top. He took my virginity.

However as a bottom Theon took that virginity. When he had found out that I had slept with Kieran first he sulked for two straight days and wouldnt speak to me. Until he came to bed that night where I waited for him naked. He was more than happy to find out that hr would be the first to enter me. Ive also learned that Theon is surprisingly very kinky as well. He has that thing gor pain as well. Not exactly knife play but he's pretty rough in bed and I loved every second of my first time with him.

That same night I slept with Heath for the first time. Both Theon and I had taken turns riding him. Heath was also secretly kinky. He liked being teased and dominated. Hes awfully seductive when you tell him what to do. He love commands and orders, but only during sex. Ive learnt that Heath is actually really scary and I definitely dont want to be on his bad side. I now conpletely understood why they called him mom and dad.

I slept with Gray next. It was very random and happened the night after I slept with Theon and Heath. He had barged into my room like normal to hide from Kieran. He had apparently pulled another prank on him. Which is something he does often and I'm pretty sure he enjoys his punishments. He heard my thoughts on the night before and we talked about it. He had concerns that I liked the others more than him and me proving that wrong ended in sweet love making. Which Kieran had busted in on and joined. Gray had gotten out of that punishment. I'm not nearly as scared of Gray as I had been when I first arrived. If anything I love thinking about sex with him randomly. His reactions are always hilarious.

Cormac was the last one I slept with. We had fooled around prier but nevet gotten farther than oral. Which he was adorable during by the way. I'm not sure why it didn't happen sooner. It just never felt like the right time with him. Eventually I went all out one night.

I set up candles, flowers and the whole nine. He cried when he saw it and I thought I had done something wrong but he attacked me. He had rode me that night and it was one of the best experiences I have ever had. He face was jaw dropping. Everything about that night had been perfect and I'm happy I had waited until then.

The next time I had sex though was with all of them. It was an extremely tiring event. It's apparently something they dont often do but it was amazing. I had been topped by Theon and Kieran, and I had once again topped Heath, Gray, and Cormac. At first it was weird knowing the others could just watch but then I realized that just made it better.

I want to spend the rest of my life with these guys. I don't need to kill myself whenever I have anxiety know. I only ever hurt myself when it's foreplay or an accident. I feel scared that they will take away my control either. They have proven again and again that I have the power to say no. Happiness used to be such a far fetched feeling before. Now it was a constant.

When my father had be locked in the basement chained up I thought for sure that death could be my only escape. That death could be the only way to be happy. Even after I had escaped and got picked up the insane asylum. I figured if I could just die that everything would be better.

Who would have thought that a house full of broken guy could end up being my sanctuary. The place I needed all along to truly be happy. To finally feel free to live.

I look down at Cormac in my arms and squeeze him against me. He snuggles closer and I grin. I was the luckiest man in the world. I found a home in a fucked up world and right along with it I found love. I guess happily ever after really do exist.