haven murphy had nothing to lose. everything was different after sarah cameron's birthday party, the night her father died. haven just didn't feel right in her own skin. then, on a whim, she befriended pope heyward and got sucked into a wild goose h...
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CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR: ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GONE
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THE HUMAN HEART WAS not made to feel such sorrow.
A lot had changedfor Haven Murphy in the two months she spent mourning her lost friends. Grief was all-consuming for someone like her. It grew and it grew in the darkest pieces of her body, like a scab picked from a wound until nothing but tender flesh remained, the first signs of healing put off at her own hand. All it would take for this loss to rear its ugly head was one wrong word, and boy were there a lot of wrong words to be found when walking on eggshells.
Haven spent the first three days locked in her bedroom where no one, not even JJ, could get through to her. But he refused to give in, even when Melinda claimed she could take care of it. He didn't believe her. He thought she was a little too wrapped up in Liam, or whatever his name was, as he moved his belongings into the Murphy household, despite only being with Melinda Maybank for a matter of weeks. They were just so 'in love' and he knew it killed Haven to hear their laughter, like her dad had never existed, like John B and Sarah were nothing but delinquent teenagers. So JJ chose to split his time between visiting Arden as she crashed on Pope's couch and sleeping in Haven's living room in the hopes she'd want to open up to him. She never did, but on nights where both their heads got too much to tolerate, she'd sneak out and sleep beside him on the pull-out, only allowing him to see just how much she was hurting. By the time JJ woke in the morning, she was back in her room refusing to speak to anyone.
It was clear Melinda was getting frustrated. She tried her best to be understanding, leaving meals at her daughter's door and even being nicer to JJ. She'd wake him up with breakfast, inquired about his day when he got home. Sometimes, they even drove to work together. Everyone, even Liam, knew it hurt her to look at him, but something had changed in that police tent. She was trying now, but trying wasn't always enough. So Liam stepped in. Haven had wanted to scream when he first approached her.
You're not him,she had thought furiously, her heart clenching as he expressed how sorry he was for her loss. So don't fucking bother.
But with every determined knock on her door, she felt herself cave a bit more. Part of her wanted to let him in, to hear what he had to say that was so different to what everyone else offered. The other part of her wanted to break something, to feel anything but this sadness. It was on the sixth day that she snapped, and the latter part of her won. Liam had come knocking with the news that Arden missed her, and something ruthless had festered in Haven's chest. She wrenched the door open, screaming the house down about how he couldn't possibly understand, and that he would never, ever be a part of her family.
"I lose everyone I love," she had sobbed as Melinda attempted to step in, her hands raised like she was approaching a wounded animal. "I just don't want to feel like this anymore."
