Perfect Strangers

34

(Sanzu POV)

Drugs.. Sex.. Gangs.. Money..

Do you see the word Love there? No. Because I never included that ridiculous word in my dictionary in the first place. Love is nothing but a chemical reaction going on inside our brain. Love is nothing but stupidity. Why choose Love when I have my drugs that could make me feel good? I mean, Sex is different but I only do sex when I'm drunk as fuck in bars or if some sluts approach me.

It always go on like that. We fuck and leave. Well I did have 3 exes—but of course, they we're only after for my money. I didn't care. Maybe because I don't feel anything special to them? Besides, they are stupid. They didn't know that they are flirting with Bonten's No. 2 heh. They even had the guts to cheat. That's why they ended up dead.

Love really means nothing to me because I don't know what it means. I only tried dating cause I thought it was fun but turns out, it was a waste of time. Fuck buddies are much more better.

I smirked as I saw a girl dancing in the middle of the dance floor. I don't know why but she caught my attention. I took a shot and admired her curves that can be seen on her red dress. The first time I laid my eyes on that girl, I already knew she was feisty. And I wasn't wrong, She is. I even had to dance behind her just to get her attention. Yes, she is feisty but I never knew she was a virgin! Fuckering shit I fucking fucked a virgin! Ugh! I knew I shouldn't Judge a book by It's cover. But.. To my surprised, I kinda enjoyed it. I never expected myself To want more from that girl. I wanted her. I wanted her most nights. So I forced her To be my fuck buddy in the hard way. As expected, she agreed. Heh. Piece of cake.

Although.. one rule caught my attention, No strings attached. I wanna laugh cause hey, Me? THE manipulative Sanzu will fall for a fuck buddy? No.

Or so I thought...

Days passed as we fucked and I Don't know.. I feel different. I thought it was just because of the drugs I take but whenever I'm with her.. even if we aren't doing it.. I feel so Free. When I'm with her, I act so differently. The weirdest thing I experienced when I was with her was when my heart started beating fast..

"Are you with us Sanzu?"

I snapped out of it and fixed my posture as I looked up To Sano Manjiro. I nodded my head. "Y-Yeah."

"Did you just shutter?" Koko asked with a questionable tone.

"He never shutters unless he's deeply thinking about something." Ran on the other hand commented.

This isn't the First time my mind was occupied by other things during a meeting and I know, they have noticed it and they just kept their mouths shut. I Don't know whats wrong with me but I started calling her from time To time. My excuse was I just wanted To fuck her but To be honest.. I just wanted To hear her voice.

Have I already fallen for that girl? I Don't really know.. but when I saw her with her ex at a restaurant laughing together.. Anger filled me. Maybe I should just lessen the Days of me fucking her so my mind wont be confused or something. But fucking hell, I missed her every fucking minute. Dammit I think I Like her... a bit..

I Don't want To share her with anybody. I want her To be with me. Only me. Whether It's about fucking or No. I want her attention To be mine. I want her eyes locked on mine.

The day came where I asked her To Go out on a vacation with me. Well, she didn't Actually had a choice that time. It was fun. It was fun hiking with her. It seems Like it was her First time but I could tell that even though she got tired, she Actually enjoyed it. I Like the way she smiles while taking pictures of the view. I mean.. the view really is Nice but.. she's the most beautiful view I stared at in my entire life.

"I fucking love you, Y/n."

I saw her blinked twice.

I never thought I would say that in front of her. But.. I just think that this is the perfect time To tell her What I really feel. I know she wont believe me at First cause for goodness sake... I'm known To be a very manipulative person.

I thought she would laugh at me but instead, I felt her soft lips against mine. At that very moment.. I already knew the answer. With every kiss she gives me, comes hope that love does exist.

"I.. love you too.."

I swore To myself that I would treat differently. I would Love her more than anything... more than my drugs. She was the only one who accepted me for who I am. She loved the worse and best part of me. I swore To protect this girl at all cost. No matter What. I can't see my self leaving her or breaking her heart.

Sano Manjiro once said to me That Y/n would be the end of me. But for the first time.. I didn't agree to him, because Y/n is just my beginning not the end.

That's why...

Don't leave me, Y/n. Please look back at me.

That's why it pains for me to see her take that last step. Tears started to fill my eyes. My hair is drenched in rain. My vision gets blurry as I saw her walk further away from me. My legs became weak. My whole body became numb. Tears didn't stop streaming down my eyes. I wanted to scream and curse but no words are coming out of my mouth. My legs feel so weak that I even had to kneel on the ground cause I lost balance.

I look pathetic..

She's gone.. the key to the beginning of my new life is gone.. and I just fucking stood there and watched her...