Girl Gone Rogue (The Shadow Hunters #2)

26. Wolfie

Kian was the first face I saw when I finally left Alexei's abode, worn out and generally in a bad mood.

I was so tired.

Kian scanned me from head to toe, taking in my dark blue dress with the pretty petals imprinted on the breezy material. I had eventually tugged it back on when the last waves of heat ebbed away, tucking one of Alexei's shirt underneath so I wasn't cold. It only left my body aching and in need of an ice-cold shower.

The days were tolerable when the heat hit but at night, when there was nothing, I could do, the desire that gripped my body felt relentless. My body strained from the demands of the Needing; the strokes of pleasure that ran along my skin soon changed into painful claws against my naked flesh.

I was grateful that when the pleasure shifted to pain, I was mercifully given reprieve by not remembering much of it.

But my body felt the remnants of it.

I felt like I just survived the apocalypse.

I spent most of the morning cleaning Alexei's space and washing the clothes I ended up wearing during the Needing, since I always woke up drenched in sweat. I managed a quick shower and pulled on my clothes. I expected shit for my incongruous outfit, but Kian said nothing. However, his scrutiny was another thing altogether. "Pen, where the hell have you been?"

I grinned, despite not feeling a hint of it. "Just chilling."

Deep concern flashed across his face. "For a whole week? I tried calling you. I went by your house too, but you weren't there. Where were you?"

I didn't know why I couldn't just say that I was going through my Needing. It wasn't something I really wanted to share with Kian. Also add in that Alexei was nowhere to be seen or heard from, I definitely was being tight lipped.

"Something is off." Kian approached me, "What happened?" He demanded.

"I had to do some thinking?"

"For a week? Alone?"

"Yeah."

Kian crossed his arms across his chest, picking up on the utter bullshit I was trying to get away with. "Tell be a better lie, Pen."

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. Of course. Kian wouldn't just settle for my bullshit answer.

He knew me, just as I knew him.

It would've been a lot easier if we had been matched by the Moon Goddess, but I only felt sisterly love for him. I knew it was the same for him. We never entertained the idea of being anything but platonic. We never even kissed. The thought of locking lips with Kian made me cringe. Besides, both Aella and I were considered annoying pests, but we were the only pests he would suffer to be around- these were the exact words Kian had used.

Since I wasn't planning to tell him about my Needing, I told his something else. A truth. However, not the truth he expected.

"I've been trying to learn how to morph into my wolf. I haven't been able to do it for weeks."

Kian opened his mouth but paused.

"What? You having trouble shifting?" Bafflement shifted to genuine worry.

This was why I loved Kian. The guy couldn't keep up the stoic façade for too long.

"I haven't shifted in a few months actually. Well, it's a bit more complicated really. I haven't had a controlled shift in the last few months." I glanced at my shoes, avoiding his eyes. I looked at the trees, the falling leaf, was that a chipmunk-