No matter how hard I tried to see the value of life in new perspectives, I couldn't help but go back to my first impression —-
The one that has been instilled on me.
The world, our society...
People around me never fail to make me feel how a certain person can be less valuable
Just because he/she didn't follow what's expected.
No matter how hard I tried to redefine the meaning of success
It will somehow go back
on how much money I earned.
And not oh how happy and contented
I am in the path I have chosen.
No matter how hard I tried to be a strong, independent, modern woman,
Someone will suddenly make me feel lost just because I didn't follow normalcy.
Someone will suddenly make me all the more lonely just because I'm alone,
Someone will suddenly make me feel scared about tomorrows, Just because my future is still unknown.
Someone will make me feel like a failure just because I didn't give much money on the table.
And the saddest part is, this someone are the people who are very close to my heart.
It breaks my heart seeing, hearing my love ones see me as failure just because I didn't meet their expectations.
It breaks my heart knowing that even though I've given my all, I will always not be enough to them.
It breaks my heart realizing
that I will never be worthy enough to them. That I can never surpass nor be equal
to that person they compared me with.
To that person they're so proud of.
To that person they almost worshipped.
It breaks my heart because I know
I can never be him.
11/19/21
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Simple Reminders
RandomA series of devotion. Encountering God's mighty gift; the Holy Spirit. These are the words from God that came to me as I read books about Him and Bible of course. Thank God for His words are alive and changing me from sinner to work in progression...
