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That night was the loudest silence San has ever experienced. It was completely quiet yet something so loud and booming kept ringing in his head. He spent that evening alone and even after Jiseol's painful words towards him, he still saw some kind of pain in her and hoped she wasn't spending it alone like him.
He laid on his bed, unmoving and eyes glued to the ceiling. It was way past midnight; it was dark and silent, but not in San's head. Jiseol's voice and most especially her words replayed in his head like a broken record. He was so tired, both physically and emotionally yet he couldn't bring himself to get even a wink of sleep.
He wasn't crying but he felt suffocated. It stung continuously. Like knives stabbing his chest alongside something heavy on it.
Remember when Jiseol told San she'll break his heart? She definitely wasn't wrong. Did he deserve it? No, but was he okay with it anyway? Yes, absolutely. Why? Because it was Jiseol that broke it. As simple as that.
Though, he still kept wondering where he went wrong and why it was so sudden. Was it something he did? Or was it something in Jiseol's kingdom? Either way, he couldn't help but feel pained that she couldn't bring herself to tell him what was wrong. The way she just broke it off was too abrupt and he couldn't accept that with a reasoning of 'it had to end at one point'. He has already told her many times that it's okay to tell him anything, especially when it involves their relationship. And he trusted that she would do that, not realizing it was easier said than done.
The moment San got a glimpse of sunlight from outside, he sprung up from his bed and got ready for the day. He couldn't bare being alone in a way too quiet room any longer.
He was finishing himself up when a knock cut through the silence. "San, I hope you're up. We have training today at 9." It was their assassination team leader, Kim Hongjoong.
"I'm awake," He replied weakly but still loud enough for the other to hear.
The men were already training when San arrived at the training grounds. Once they had noticed his presence, they stopped what they were doing and squinted to make sure they were actually seeing what they were seeing.
"Woah! Are you about to eat my brain? You look like a zombie." Jongho choked a laugh.
"Not the time, Jongho." Seonghwa shook his head disapprovingly, approaching San. "Did you not sleep well? You look so pale and your eye bags are darker than usual."
"Yeah, you can skip training today if you need to rest." The leader offered.
