To Find You (Harry Styles)

#SleepoverStatus

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"Harry!" I giggled wildly as he picked me up and started spinning me around his apartment.

It had been three weeks since I met him in the mall and we had been inseparable since. He was  practically my big brother. He was overprotective but was fun and amusing to mess with. He called me "Baby girl" and I call him "Hazz" but with my accent it sounded more like "Hayz". I got made fun of it every day by him but it never grew old.

The first time I brought him home my parents weren't too pleased. My dad did the whole interrogation thing during dinner and slyly suggested many times that he had a gun upstairs. My mom knew about Harry before my dad because she had to drive me everywhere since I was too lazy to get my permit yet.

One week ago Harry finally admitted that he was in One Direction. He probably thought that I hadn't known this whole time but I had known all along. Ever since I heard his voice I've known that he was Harry Styles. But to me he was just Harry, Harry from England. Harry with the amazing singing voice that can make any girl swoon. Including me.

Yes, I was a Harry girl always have been since the beginning of their existence but I found out that I loved him even more in person than I did on the posters. He's like my big brother and that's what I think of him as, but I guess I always think about what it would be like if we loved each other differently.

Since my high school was near the college campus where Harry's "supposed to be going to school"he camw and picked me up everyday from school and we hung out while he helped me with my homework. Sometimes we went out to eat but when there's a bunch of paparazzi around we had to be careful. We had to wear disguises whenever we went anywhere besides his dark window tinted car but it's worth it.

He said he's going to take me all over the world someday and we're going to go to Paris like I've always dreamed for my birthday and stay there until Christmas and will watch them light the Christmas tree in Paris and light the Eiffel Tower on Christmas Eve night. Christmas was both of our favorite holidays so we can't wait for it to come around this years so we can spend it together.

I hadn't met all the members of the band but the one I saw the most is Louis and of course Louis is Louis he's going to be crazy and the first time I met him he completely caught me off-guard. Apparently Harry had been mentioning this girl named Olivia to all his friends and they really wanted to meet her (I guess me )but he didn't know how to introduce me to them without them freaking out and jumping to the wrong conclusion.

I guess you could say Harry and I had a flirtationship, less than a relationship more than a friendship but we never wanted to let each other know how far we wanted to go.

I'm 15 and he's 19 (his birthday was a couple days ago) and it's illegal and there's really no reason for us to put ourselves in danger to be with each other.

Harry laid me on the couch and then sat down so my feet were on his lap. He flipped on the TV and we ended up watching some cop show that ended up with me being terrified and burying my face in his chest the entire time. This is our usual routine.Him comforting me when I was scared and entertaining me when I was bored.

On this specific night I was going to spend the night. It was a Friday so my parents didn't mind. They would rather me be with Harry than at any other of my friends' houses. It was my first time spending the night here and honestly I was extremely nervous. He had an extra room for me to sleep in and he bought me furniture and panted it pink so I could feel more at home. It was unnecessary but I appreciated the gesture.

We ordered pizza, for the seventh time that week,and ate the entire box in less than two minutes. Harry says that he will never have to worry about me starving myself because I can't last more than three hours without food. I guess that's a good thing? He says that me and Niall would get along great.

By this time my head was laying in Harry's lap and he was playing with my hair. Probably trying to make me go to sleep. He was always worried that I would stay up too late at his house and never be allowed back.

"As much as I appreciate you braiding my hair Hazz I'm not going to sleep that easily" I chuckled to myself.

"W-what? I wasn't-" he stuttered

"Oh cut the shit Hazz, I knew what you were doing," I smiled to myself but quickly realized what I had done.

"...What did you just say?" He questioned angrily stopping in the middle of his French braid.

"No-nothing," I replied too quickly

"Thought so,"he sternly retorted, returning to my hair.

Harry was more protective over me than my own parents at times. He didn't let me cuss, watch anything rated r or do anything a normal spunky teen girl would do.

"You know spring break's in a few weeks...what are we going to do about it?" I questioned.

Harry had been talking about going back and visiting his parents and sister in England and he'd mentioned taking me with him but I wasn't so sure that was the best idea. He said he wasn't going to give up though.

" I don't really know. I don't wanna leave you here alone for an entire week without me or vice versa. It would be really hard, practically impossible." He mumbled to himself. This is true we couldn't even last a day without each other.

" I'll miss you" I whispered close to tears.

" Baby don't cry! Shhh Haz is here" he comforted me rocking me back and forth against his chest.

" I guess we just have to face it soon. We aren't going to be with each other forever so why try to make it last." I said standing up.

"Baby what are doing? Come here" he said reaching out his hand.

" No! I don't want to be reminded of how much it will hurt when your gone!" I yelled sobbing dashing to my room and slamming the door.

I stood there and sat against the door while frantic banging was happening on the other side.

"Baby? Baby! Baby?! Open this door right now! " He screamed through the door.

I couldn't even respond. Every time I opened my mouth a choking sob would come out. I climbed over to my bed and pulled back the covers sliding in. While hugging my pillow close to my chest I told myself that it would be okay. That everything would work out.

The banging finally stopped after an hour and instead I heard him on the phone muttering something and...crying?

"I don't known, Lou. Sure we've had our fights but it's never been this bad. Yes...yeah it's locked. I'm just worried... Ever since she told me last week...I just...." And then he broke down and I couldn't take it anymore. I unlocked the door and crept back to my bed.

I suffered from depression in middle school. It was more severe than I originally thought it was. I told Harry a week ago because he brought it up somehow. Let's just say he didn't take it very well.

I curled up into the fetal position, something me and Harry both had in common, I rocked myself back and forth trying to go to sleep. After about ten minutes I knew there was no use. Harry had just gotten off the phone with Louis and was pacing outside my door. Finally he tried opening it and succeeded.

I opened my eyes and saw two figures walk into my room. Each one sat one either side of my bed. I pretended to be asleep but I knew Harry could see right through me.

I felt someone brush my hair out of my face and kiss my forehead.

It wasn't Harry.