✅ The Last New Start [NaNoWriMo2021]

28. A Walk in the Park

"Look, why don't you come round to my place?"

Tess had been thinking about it, but she didn't realise she had actually made a decision until the words were already out of her mouth.

"Really? I thought your cousin didn't want you bringing people round. Especially not boys. Right?"

"Yeah. Well, no, I don't know. I've kind of... ugh, this is a pain to explain, and I don't know where to start."

"If there's something you don't want to say, you don't have to." That was classic Spike; he said that he didn't want pry into all your secrets, but unlike everyone else he really meant it. Just like he probably meant it when he said he would do anything for his friends. Cutting his own plans short so he could help with one of her problems was always a sign that he was Spike, but the same thing from any other guy would have meant he was hitting on her, or expected something in exchange.

"Yeah, but I... Well, I can show you where my house is, anyway. If you don't have real plans for the evening. I'd be glad of someone to talk to, it's a bit of a walk from the bus stop." They were already stopping, and Spike just nodded as Tess gathered up her bags. She knew him well, and she felt guilty about not telling him the big secret she was keeping from all of her friends. And she knew that after hearing, he would be happy to walk home without expecting anything.

As they walked back towards the house, she decided it would be better to take a slightly indirect route. The bus stop was close to the linear park, where a cycle path followed a route that might have been a railway line in some planner's imagination. It was a minute or two longer than walking directly, but the scenery was better and the cycle path seemed less likely to become slippery as the temperatures started to get below freezing. They talked about a few inconsequential things for a moment, before Tess worked up the courage to bring up not inviting friends around.

"Gabby said I can invite friends if I want to. And I'd love to see everyone again. But..."

"It's hard to talk about?"

"Yeah. But you can put me on the spot if you want. Sometimes I'm too embarrassed to do the things I really should do, and I really need someone I can trust that far to give me a push. I do trust you, Spike. A lot of the time I think you know what's best for me better than I do."

"Thank you. But I think you know I won't think any less of you, so you want to say what's on your mind, right? No push necessary."

"Yeah. Basically, the deal is I could invite people round now, but I'm scared. My room is... it's embarrassing. Gabby didn't have time to redecorate before I arrived, she was out of town. And the previous owners had it as the kids' room. So all the decor is like baby turned up to eleven. And I just know that all my friends would have to take a look around, even if we were chilling in the lounge. I couldn't stand somebody calling me baby."

"I can understand that. With the things people said to you in the past, I mean. I promise, I won't go looking unless you want me to see something. And I won't ever laugh at something I know you're sensitive about."

He meant it, too. Of course he did. Spike could tease mercilessly, she'd already discovered that, but he would never be hurtful. He brought up her past mistakes when he knew they would both find it funny, but he never said anything that would make her feel bad. And he knew that Tess never had to take things seriously, that she would happily laugh at anyone's mistakes or misfortune, even her own. But from the first time he'd seen her in tears, after a shopkeeper asked if he was buying a treat for his little sister, he had never brought up her baby face or naïveté.

"I mean... I've not asked if I can invite you in, but I don't think she'll mind. I don't actually know if she'll be home yet, she was away at some conference last night. I just... I'm not sure what she'll think. If the first person I bring round is a guy. I think a part of her still thinks of me as a little kid, like when she was this age and she was babysitting. She was a bit OTT even hearing that there was a boy with us when we went to Ashfields. But if she gets to know you..."

"Worried she might think we're a carefree young couple?"

"Yeah. I... Not that that's a bad thing, I mean. You're an incredible guy and if you had a girlfriend she'd be so lucky... or a boyfriend, I mean... Is it weird you've been such a good friend, and I totally don't know which you're into? Or if you have someone. You know, like, everybody in the whole school, you've got friends I've never spoken to and I never asked if there's someone special. I'm not such a good friend, am I? I think I should"

"Stop digging, Carly," he delivered the line with a trace of a Georgian accent, and in a resonant baritone that sounded oh so serious. It didn't last long before his smile cracked and he bent over in laughter, shortly after Tess failed to contain the giggles.

"Okay, I get nervous asking personal stuff. It's just like Chloe and Liz always talk about who they're interested in, even Kim when she thinks about it. And I never asked you, or I wasn't paying attention. Seems weird now I thought about it."

"I don't have anyone," he said with a smile, and reached out to take her hand. "I'm happy spending time with my friends. But I promise if I start actively pursuing a romantic relationship, you'll be the first to know." He sounded so sincere that Tess almost wondered if she was supposed to laugh again, and then found herself starting to blush as she realised there could be more than one meaning to that sentence. Was he joking with her, or did he really mean...?

"Anyway, this is me," she said, gesturing towards the house. It was large from the outside, a timber frame building that seemed designed to look older than it really was. This street was for people richer than ninety percent of Palmerston, and it was clear that the majority of people here either took pride in their gardens or could afford someone to do it for them. "Big house, I think we don't even use all of it. Would you like to stay for dinner? If it's okay with Gabby, I mean. Or I could get you a coffee at least, after you walked me home. It's really cold out here, you need to get some warmth in you."

"I wouldn't say–" he started, and then went silent as he saw Tess's expression change.