In outer sea | hyunlix

🌊To keep me warm🌊

Everyone slowly got up and dressed for the occasion, not wearing the same clothes as the few days before. They had to show off of course.

"We're here captain!" Chan yelled from his post as the two youngest of the group dropped the anchor in the water, waiting for it to be completely stable before preparing the smaller boat to get them to shore.

Felix sat back and watched everyone do what they were supposed to, feeling quite useless. He could see the town they had spoken of, full of life and light. Hyunjin then walked behind him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"How did you sleep last night? I didn't get the chance to see you this morning"

"Yeah I woke up early, so I cooked us a few things"

"Good, hopefully you will find more things in the market, also I've got a special quest for you. While we'll be there, I'll be quite busy so I need you to keep an eye on Minho."

"But he's my friend, why would I spy on him?"

"Then if you're right, theirs nothing to worry about...just keep your eyes opened" he leaned in close to his ear, smiling.

"Maybe you can even be rewarded..."

"W-with what?"

"What ever pleases you love" was the last thing he said before leaving him to watch the sea again. He was day dreaming again, enjoying the sounds of the waves crashing on the side of the boat, the dolphins playing in the water.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Minho walked up to him when he saw Hyunjin leave.

"It really is...captain said you were robbed by pirates? Is it true?"

"Yeah...my parents died a while back so I owned the shop on my own, one day a boat came close to my house and well...I didn't see the black and white flag with a skull on it..."

"I'm so sorry..."

"It's alright...next thing I knew they barged in and grabbed everything valuable, finally setting fire to the place...I was on the streets for a while before Jisung spotted me. He came and sat down next to me to talk and boy did he have my heart already...he begged for his brother to take me in, to which he refused several times. After a while though, Hyunjin gave in and accepted me to be part of the team...but I have nothing apart from this"

"I can't even imagine..."

"Yeah...it's been a though few years"

"Everyone get on the boat, we're leaving!" Changbin said as a few people were already on it. They all sat down and lowered it into the water, starting to row towards the land.

Slowly but surely they reached it and tied it to the dock, marching towards the loud crowds.

It was full of colour there, so many varieties of everything you can think of. Their were spices, different fruits, weapons and clothes. Felix looked in wonder, going to different kiosks, still staying quite close to Minho. He could feel everyone staring at him, he assumed it was his hair that was getting him this was attention, which he didn't really like.

"Jisung come look at this" Minho took his hand and walked to a station with a bunch of vegetables.

"This could be great for a soup, here." He handed him a bit of money, smiling at him.

"Chose What you like, then we can go pick you an outfit in the clothes isle, but I just have to do something first" without another word he left, leaving Felix to decide what he should get. He grabbed a few things, paying for them and putting them in a bag he had on him.

He then turned around but Minho was nowhere to be found, so he walked around for a while, searching for his friend.

It's then that he saw it...

A possible escape. It was right there for him, no one around that could hold him back. He could sprint away and never see them again, he could end it all. So slowly he walked towards the water, going to the very end of the docks, leaning forwards to look at the water. Its then that it came again, the urge, the need for it to all go dark.

He stepped a foot in front, dropping the bag at his feet, a tear leaving his eye as he prepared himself for the impact. He hit the water straight on, not even thinking about it much, he just did it. It was pitch black now, no light like last time. He assumed this was the end then, no more second chance at life, no more trying...but was this truly what he wanted?

After a few moment of quiet, something disturbed the water.

He heard a splash next to him, then something pulling his arm. He didn't even fight it, he just let himself be dragged out of the water, his body trembling as he cried tears on his already wet face.

"Felix why would you do that?!" Minho panicked, checking if he was still alive. He took his face in his hand as he was also covered in water now.

"I..." he broke down in even more tears, unable to explain it. It was still so hurtful to breath, to walk, to talk. So fucking draining and he could never escape it, no matter how much he tried.

"Hey it's okay, I'm not mad at you..." he took him close to his chest, patting his head.

"You just scared me..." he held him even tighter, Felix only clinging to him more, it eased it a bit. He's never had someone there for him in the other attempts he had to take his life. He was usually alone, not one to check up on him since he was in his room most of the time. He regretted not succeeding the last times...but now it was sort of neutral, like if he didn't mind that Minho pulled him out.

"We don't even have to talk about it, just breath, can you do that for me?" Felix nodded, trying to control his lungs. It's like he was saying exactly what he needed to hear.

"Minho I'm so sorry..."

"Why are you sorry? You did nothing wrong...we should get back to the others, but first we'll take the time you need" Felix nodded and frowned when he saw Minho shedding a tear.

"Why are you crying?"

"Because I thought I had lost my only friend..."

He actually cared?

He wasn't joking, Felix could tell he was genuinely sad about it.

Someone cared for him the way he could never care about himself.