Carnal Cravings(Alastor x reader)

As time goes by we grow closer

It had been a long month since your first met Alastor, and it had been an absolute dream, almost every single day you and Alastor would go out and paint the town, sometimes you would paint it red with the blood of your enemies, or whatever unfortunate soul that crossed your path.

Other times you would just go out to dinner, or out for drinks.No matter what it was, you always had a good time.And with every moment Alastor grew ever fonder of you.He always looked forward to seeing you, you were always the best part of his day.He would always pluck you from the hotel to go off and do fun things even when it was inconvenient for the both of you and it made him late for a business meeting, but it was worth it.You were worth it.

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(Flash back no 1.)

"AHHH get away from me!" the demon screamed.

Alastor cocked his head bearing an evil grin.You and both laughed maniacally before zeroing in on him.Snapping his fingers Alastor's shadows restrained him.

You grinned before leaning in close to the demons face.

"How about a dad joke?"You grinned evilly.

The demon's eyes went wide.

"NO!PLEASE!" he begged but was interrupted by Alastor sinking his claws into his shoulder slightly.

"Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?" Alastor whispered in his ear.

The demon whimpered.

"He couldn't see himself doing it!" Alastor exclaimed making you both roar with laughter, the demon wailed in despair before trying to escape but it was no use.

"Oh i got one." You wheezed.

"Wha-why can't you hear a psychiatrist use the restroom?" You snickered

Alastor bit his lip trying to muffle his laughter.

"Why?"

"BECAUSE THE P IS SILENT!" You wheezed making Alastor explode.

The restrained demon writhed and wailed in despair.

"Please make it stop!" he cried making you and Alastor laugh harder.

"Heyheyhey...Why couldn't the bike stand up by itself?" You giggled patting the demon on the shoulder.

"It was two tired!Get it!? Two Tired!?" You hooted.

Your laughter only intensified as the demon continuously cringed and begged you to stop, but it was just too good.Oh how you loved torturing people with dad jokes.

"What's brown and sticky!? A stick!!" Alastor announced.

You both roared with laughter tears beginning to form in the corner of your eyes as the demon screamed.This was the best kind of torture.

"You wanna hear a joke about paper?" You asked patting the demon on the shoulder.

"NO!" he cried trying to get out of the shadows death grip.

"That's ok it was TEARABLE ANYWAY!" You laughed making the demon let out a shrill scream.

"THEY'RE ALL TERRIBLE PLEASE LET ME GO!!" the demon cried.

Alastor grabbed the demon by his jaw.

"Hey Y/n what time did the man go to the dentist?" he grinned sinisterly.

You rose a brow giggles escaping your lips.

Alastor ripped the demons jaw clean off before taking one of their teeth and putting it through the their eye, killing him in the process.

"Tooth Hurty"

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( flashback no 2.)

"AW Come onnn won't you sing for us?"

"AHH LET ME GO!!" the demons screamed.

You had two drug dealers dangling over a pit full of Alastor's blood thirsty minions while you and Alastor laid in lawn chairs close by with drinks in your hands, a little tipsy.

"Oh sing "Your never fully dressed without a smile"~!" Alastor slurred making you giggle.

"I DON'T KNOW THAT SONG!" one of them wailed.

"Oh well then." You shrugged before reaching over to cut the rope.

"NO WAIT!" the other demon cried.

Your grin became sinister as they began to sing, sobbing at the same time.

"Hey, Hobo man hey Dapper Dan, you've all got your style.."

"BUT BROTHER YOUR NEVER FULLY DRESSED WITHOUT A SMILLLEE!" you and Alastor sang waving your hands in the air.

"Your clothes may be "Beau Brumelly,"They stand out a mile..." They sobbed as they dangled above the ravenous minions.

"BUT BROTHER YOUR NEVER FULLY DRESSED WITHOUT A SMILLLE!!" Alastor sang as he pulled you up beginning to dance with you.

"Who cares what they're wearing
On Main Street or Saville Row?
It's what you wear from ear to ear,
And not from head to toe!" You and Alastor sang as you waltzed.

"That ma-ha-ha-tters" The demons sobbed again before continuing to sing the song while you and Alastor danced around the pit obnoxiously singing along until they messed up and got the lyrics wrong.You cut the rope and instead danced to their screams.

"My Y/n you are simply wonderful!" Alastor flirted as he spun you around.

"Not too bad yourself mister." You flirted back while you danced to their screams and the sound of flesh being torn and devoured.

"Not too bad indeed."