Crossing the gangster

chapter 7

Short chris's POV

When she said that against me, it struck me hard. The small conscious in me that I had managed to suffocate over the years with my blood-tainted hands reminded me that what she was saying was exactly correct and it was what no one for years dared to tell me.

The enraged words had seared my broken heart forever...

But all I could feel then, to cover up the emotions I had dreaded would once resurface, was motherfucking rage. How dare she say that to me, especially when she was a walking target for me to murder.

She didn't have the goddamn right and I told her as much in the fucking speech that I bellowed as I gripped her throat. If she thought I would have gone soft and easy on her she thought wrong.
Immediately, at the contact of my warm hand encasing her cold skin, her eyes squeezed shut and I wanted to fucking laugh at the coward hanging limply in my hands. But it was when she opened her eyes again and they bore into my green ones was when disbelief coursed through me.

It was as if I was looking through an empty window to already see a corpse lying there. It was as if she had given up on life before I even made my decision to end hers. It was the most fucking terrifying thing I had seen in my life, the hollowness and emptiness, the resigned decision, the exchange as she gave her life willingly into deaths hands.

I had seen many more gruesome things in my life, people's heads severed, blood choking their throats as they slowly died a slow, painful death that no one but myself had dealt them to but nothing made me feel as much fear that was coursing through me at that moment.

Because all of my other victims still had a fire till the last minute, still had the fight to live another minute, still wanted to live but she didn't. And for some reason, I let go when I was a minute away from ending the burden she placed on my shoulders.

I may have not killed her but the guilt was still there, the guilt that I had resigned her to look so dejected and hopeless when her smiles made my heart flutter ever so slightly, the guilt that the only reason I didn't kill her was that she wanted to die.

I forced myself to believe that a small, twisted and cruel, part of me wanted to snatch her away from her wish, not that I wanted her to be alive to see her laugh once more.

Though just because I didn't end her didn't mean I was going to take her to the infirmary. Before I left her there, I couldn't stop myself from checking that faint yet beating pulse.

She would hate me but she would live and maybe it was easier that way, for both her and the resurfacing emotions I took years to control....

Hazel's POV

My eyes fluttered slightly, adjusting to the bright light that shone down upon me. Was this heaven? Was I finally dead? Was I happy to be dead?

But as my eyes adjusted to the light streaming in, I recognised my surroundings immediately and the events of last night flashed in my head, my jaw clenching. That cunt didn't even have the guts to finish me off.

With shaking legs, weak from being crumpled under me for god knows how many hours, I stood up, resting my back against the wall behind me. Just the moment I closed my eyes, tears prickling slightly at the near-death incident, did the door swing open.

Please don't be him, please don't be him I hoped silently because I never ever wanted to talk to him ever again after what he did. I wish I could just leave, run away and escape but I knew that hope was futile.

Instead, a feminine voice rang out, "hazel, there you are. I have been looking for you to ages and..." It cut off abruptly and I opened my eyes to see Izzy staring at my neck, her face slackened with