private affair ✨ || ksj au [COMPLETED]

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It was spring and Seokjin could sense it. Even though officially it had been spring for quite some while now.
He didn't feel it by rising temperatures or the sun appearing for more hours than usual though. No, he could sense it by the way he felt lonelier than ever before. Because all of a sudden he realized having already spend a whole year in that strange city. He sighed, turning around in his sheets. His eyes meeting the big glass windows the walls were almost completely made of. Staring outside at the skyscrapers and neon lights. The night was like any other. Like all the other long and quiet nights, which just passed by. Maybe not completely quiet in a city that never slept. But quiet for someone like him up there.

It was just another lonely night for him in his New Yorker apartment.

He exhaled deeply and closed his eyes again. Trying to sleep, too many thoughts preventing him from that. It wasn't like he was insomniac or didn't want to sleep. More the opposite -he didn't want anything more than sleep. Somehow he couldn't though.

This feeling inside him eating him alive. Or at least so it felt. This feeling wasn't anything new to him though. He had felt it ever since he had set foot in this concrete jungle. Little by little it grew bigger and bigger. Some days more, some less. Winter had been the hardest so far, but he had somehow managed to survive it. When the sun was shining while he was walking through the streets and parks he felt it less. But on cloudy days and nights it got intenser.

Seokjin wasn't an extrovert neither did he enjoy being in constant company by people. The people he saw on a daily basis would be enough for him. But the emptiness he felt when returning to an equally empty apartment made him realize just how lonely he actually had been.  Weekends usually passed by without him even parting his lips once to speak. The only exception being if talking on the phone with his family or friends back home.

The rest of the time he just spent in silence. Sleeping, eating, playing video games and reading. By now someone would assume that he would already been used to that as he had already spend a year like this. And he somehow was. Nevertheless, that didn't change the fact he felt lonely and wanted someone to talk to occasionally. Someone outside of the people he saw every day. Someone in his free time. Someone like a friend.

It was useless though. He didn't have friends. At least not in this city. Not real ones. His real friends were literally on the other side of the globe. And he just couldn't bring himself to consider any of the people he saw from Monday to Friday as real friends. They felt more like acquaintances he could have small talks with in between of classes but nothing more. They were nice -well most of them- but they were just not his type of people to hang out with outside of college.

He didn't regret coming there though. It had been his own wish and decision after all. And he had only one more year to go anyway. No, that wasn't it. The college wasn't the problem. It had even exceeded this expectations. The real issue was getting used to living in this different culture with no one but himself. No one to talk to. No one to hang out with. No one to share anything with. Just so he wouldn't have to talk to himself and feel insane each time he caught himself doing it. Just to break the silence.

Because all the wealth couldn't fill this little emptiness inside his heart.

"Useless," he angrily mumbled then. Tossing his sheets away. The little tiredness that had brought him to bed a little while ago, was completely gone by now. There was no point in trying. So he got up, ignoring his clock telling him it was past midnight. He put on some clothes and his sneakers, grabbed his jacket and left. Heading to the underground carpark. A few minutes later already sitting in his car and driving in the empty streets of New York City.

He didn't know where he was exactly going, nor what he was looking for. He just had the urge of driving around to clear his mind a little in the sea of lights. An maybe look out for what he needed that night -another person.

He drove and drove, not noticing he was already in the Upper Eastside and slowly leaving Manhattan. He might have lived there for a year, but it wasn't like he already knew all parts of the city and wouldn't sometimes even get lost without the GPS on his phone. However, he hadn't turned it on this night. Not thinking he would go much far from his place anyway. He only noticed when his glance fell on the clock. He had been mindlessly driving around for over half an hour. And it was only then when he noticed a sign on the side of the street. Half covered by leaves from a crooked tree which were rustling in the night breeze. He was in the Bronx. 

As far as he remembered he had never been there before and from all he had heard, he had never wanted to anyway. This wasn't really a good place for a foreigner with an expensive car to be at past midnight. He swallowed hard nervously tightened his grip around the steering wheel. It was alright, he just had to stay calm and take a turn back to the city. 

The traffic lights went red though, forcing him to stop. Even though he wanted nothing more than floor the gas pedal and simply rush out of there. Anxiously staring at the light to turn back green, while switching on the GPS. A sudden knock against the car window then making him slightly jump in his seat. His heart skipped a beat as he was sure that his end had come. "So this is how it ends. On the streets of a foreign city by a stranger with a gun or a knife or maybe even something worse," he thought to himself when slowly turning his head. Already preparing himself for a tragic death, when all he saw was a girl waving at him instead.

With furrowed eyes he cranked down the window, allowing her to fold her arms on the frame. "Hey, pretty," she smiled. Her dark brown waves cascading from her shoulders. Her eyes were as dark as the night itself or so they seemed due to the only source of light being a street lamp close by. She lightly cocked her head then as her eyes wandered from his eyes, to his lips and back to his eyes, which were just widely staring at her like a deer caught in the headlights. Blinking anxiously. To say his reaction didn't confuse her would be a lie. "You want some company?"

For a moment he just stared at her perplexed. Knowing exactly what she meant with 'company'. However, he did need company after all, didn't he? This was the reason he went out in the middle of the night after all.

So without thinking much he slowly nodded, watching the corners of her lips tucking into a wide smile.

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