Obliviate ; Fred Weasley

Thirty-three

I didn't get much sleep that night.

When Fred woke up the next morning, I was awake, staring at the ceiling while trying to control my shaking hands by placing them on my bare stomach.

Fred groaned, rolled onto his side and sat up. He ran both hands over his face, taking a deep breath and then he got up to leave the room, not having noticed that I was awake.

I could hear him open the door to the bathroom and shut it again and when he returned to the bathroom, he looked at me and paused.

"I didn't know you were awake." He said, but I didn't answer.

I could feel my throat closing in, my lungs fighting for air. My hands were clenching the duvet tightly and I was getting dizzy.

It was the same feeling I had when I sat between the bed and the nightstand. It was the same feeling I had experienced multiple times before.

I hated it.

I felt stuck. I couldn't do anything to fight it. My vision blurred and as Fred spoke again, he sounded so far away.

Then I felt his hands on my arms, pulling me into a sitting position, and I saw his face in front of mine.

By this point, I was hyperventilating, grasping at his shoulders while shutting my eyes.

I could hear his voice but I didn't process any of the words that left his mouth. His arm slid around my shoulders, holding me tightly against him while his other hand took mine, giving it a squeeze.

Then he pulled back to look at me as I squeezed his hand tightly. He cupped one side of my jaw, leaning his forehead against mine, and this time when he spoke, I concentrated on his voice.

"You're okay. You're safe." He said softly, brushing my cheek with his thumb. "I'm not leaving you, yeah? I'm right here with you."

I moved a hand up to my throat, clutching at it while I gasped for air.

"I can't—" but gulped harshly. "...I— breathe. I can't—"

"Yes you can." He assured me. "I know it feels like you can't, but I promise you, you are breathing. You aren't suffocating."

I nodded quickly, but Fred shook his head, taking my hand. He pressed two of my fingers to my neck, making me feel my own pulse.

"Feel your pulse." He said quietly. "Then take a deep breath."

I did what he said, following his pace as he kept inhaling, exhaling, inhaling, exhaling.

"See, you're okay." He said softly. "You're not dying."

I kept breathing deeply and not long after, my breathing slowed down, as well as my pulse.

I looked at Fred, running both my hands up to his shoulders.

"I'm okay." I whispered, and Fred offered me a smile, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"Yeah you are."

I slid my arms around his back and hugged him, resting my head against his chest. Fred placed a hand against my head, holding me against him.

"Did anything happen?" He asked softly. "Or do you not know?"

"Mum's sick." I whispered. "Her organ's are shutting down."

Fred's grip on me tightened a little and he rested his head against mine.

"I'm sorry."

I ran my hand to the nape of his neck, sliding my fingers into his hair.

I kept hugging him, never wanting to let go but then I realised that my sister was staying at the flat, so I pulled back, wiped my cheeks and looked towards our bedroom door.