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○Four months later○

It's been four months. Four months without Chloe. Four months without talking to Chloe. Four months without seeing Chloe. Four months without hearing Chloe's laugh. I'm miserable to say the least. When I left Chloe, I wanted to delete Chloe's number and never answer her calls or texts. I wish Chloe would call me, but I know Chloe is fine without me.

I handle things better than I had thought. Sure, I'm still crying some nights, thinking about Chloe but I know I have to move on. Stacie is there for me. When Stacie is with me, I have to pretend like I don't miss Chloe as much as I do and just smile.

Two weeks ago I bought a new phone and added numbers back into my contacts. Emma, Liam, Wyatt... Everyone from my family and Chloe's family, but also Chloe herself. I know all their numbers out of mind. It might be stupid to add Chloe in my contacts, but I just can't ban her entirely from my life. I still love her.

I'm looking for an apartment to live in, since I don't have a place to live. I'm now living with Wyatt, but I can't live with him forever. I need my own space. Living with any of my other siblings can't, because they are siding with Chloe. They accepted that she cheated on me and that she's married now. They should know that I never would agree to that. Emma tries to call me every night, but I never answer. Same goes for Kara and Liam. The only person I talk to is Wyatt. He's the only one who is just as mad as I am.

Last week I bought a new notebook, just so I can write again. I contacted Republic Records and asked if I could be an intern there. Four days ago I had a job interview and I'm really excited that they want to meet with me again. The interview must have gone good, right? I love to work there. It's going to be a little hard, because Emily is working there too. Don't get me wrong, I love legacy but she also sided with Chloe. I just don't get it. All the Bella's knew how much I loved Chloe and that I would be heart broken if Chloe ever cheated or left me. Now that she did, they all are supporting Chloe and sympathize with her.

Today I'm meeting Matthew. He was the only one I could talk to in three years. He was crashed with his helicopter on the same island I was on. We both transformed his army helicopter as a small house, with two hammocks and the supplies that were already in the helicopter. I had to survive but luckily not on my own. It was hard, but thinking about Chloe kept me alive.

I walk down the street towards Starbucks at Central Park south, where Matthew is waiting for me. We have been together for three years, so he practically feels like my brother. He knows about Chloe, but he doesn't know that she's married. I cross the road, across from the Starbucks and open the front door of the Starbucks.

,,Beca!" Matthew sees me the moment I walk inside.

,,Matt, good to see you again!" I say and give him a hug. We sit down at a table by the window. ,,How are you holding up?" I ask him. ,,Have you seen your wife and daughter?" Matthew nods.

,,They couldn't believe it was really me. Julie and Leah were so happy."

,,I'm happy for you, I wish that was the same with me." I look down at my coffee for a moment.

,,Was Chloe not happy to see you?"

,,I have no idea." I look at him. ,,She's happily married and has a son. She forgot all about me."

,,I'm sorry, Bec." Matthew put his hand on my shoulder.

,,Thank you. It hurts like hell and that's why I haven't seen or talked to her in four months. I just can't." I feel tears prick in my eyes again. ,,I tried so hard to come back alive so I could be with Chloe but I guess I loved her more than she loved me." I quickly take a sip from my coffee to wash away the lump forming in my throat. ,,And now I have to look for an apartment because I can't live with my little brother forever."

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