Just like a dream...

Chapter 18 : Lantern Festival II

Chapter 18 : Lantern Festival II

"I have always loved Wei Ying..."
Lan Zhan said to him...

"Huh...?"

"I have always loved Wei Ying...right from the time Wei Ying came to Cloud recesses for studies..."

"This time...?"
Wei Ying asked confused...

Lan Zhan shook his head...

"Oh..."
Wei Ying mouthed in shock...

"It broke my heart everytime Wei Ying pushed me away...I tried hard...I tried really hard to get through but...I failed...i failed because Wei Ying thought that I was doing all that because I didn't trust you...I have never felt so helpless..."

"I trusted Wei Ying with everything I had...I have always trusted you...I just wanted to protect you...To stand by your side...not against you..."

Silence ensued...

"I want to be there for Wei Ying..."
Hearing the words, something that Wei WuXian had never felt before sprouted within his heart....There was sadness and his chest hurt a bit, but he also felt a warmth spread in his heart...This was a poignant moment with an overshadowing of a horrific future...

Wei Ying stared straight ahead smiling sadly...

********

They sat in companiable silence in the rock beside the cold pond for some time... Wei Ying was lost in thoughts as if reminiscing something...

"I knew..."
Lan Zhan said softly to Wei Ying, adoring the way the latter was moving his legs making the water of the pond ripple...

"Huh...?"
Wei Ying asked absently...

"I heard Wei Ying say to Jiang Cheng that day..."
Lan Zhan confessed...
For a moment Wei Ying looked at Lan Zhan shocked...But then he pouted...

"And still you gave me cold treatment...You are mean Lan Zhan..."
Wei Ying said playfully knowing the reason that Lan Zhan did so was because of the Wens spying on him...

Contemplating his actions of the past, Wei Ying knew that he was trying to do right the whole time when he tried to protect the weak and oppressed...

He knew that he was trying to repay a debt to the family that gave him shelter when he was out in the streets struggling to survive by giving his golden core to Jiang Cheng...

He knew that he tried hard to live with the choices he made to honor the debt...

But to the rest of the world including Lan Zhan, Wei Wuxian was the one who lost it, who went the deep end, made an incredibly powerful and dangerous weapon, and practiced demonic cultivation that corrupted him and turned him into a monster...

And he didn't know what, the fact that Lan Zhan had loved him inspite of all that, made him feel...

"Thank you..."
Wei Ying said after sometime turning towards Lan Zhan...
Lan Zhan though hurt hearing that, didn't say anything...

But Wei Ying immediately realized that Lan Zhan was hurt...

"No...no...I didn't mean to like 'thank you' thank you...I...err...never thought...i mean...you are the noble Hanguang Jun...and I am...well..."
Wei Ying trailed off...

"I'm sorry...I..."
He added sadly...

Lan Zhan shook his head stopping him...
Because he knew where this was coming from...
He knew the Wei Ying sitting right next to him wasn't the Wei Ying who came to Cloud Recesses back then...
He wasn't the same happy person he was back then, but was a man traumatized by everything that happened in the past, the fear of which was still weighing down on him...