Eliot Strange and the Prince of the People

A Mother in England

The mother sneezes for the fourth time this morning. Damn dampness, she thinks. I'm coming down with a summer cold, as if there are not enough problems already.

She and her husband, the king, and their very large entourage are hiding underground, literally, underground in a cold, damp apartment in a basement somewhere in a set of cheap apartments in Bexley. They are so well hidden that the queen is unsure of their exact location.

Necessary, discretion is necessary said their security detail. We can't keep you safe otherwise. The king's broken left foot and arm confirm the danger.

Torin's mother has lived in worse places, back when she was an American and before she married royalty. Still, that was a long time ago. She does not like living underground. She is grouchy and annoyed. She sneezes again. Dammit.

Just when the mother prepares to complain to the ladies in waiting for the hundredth time that morning, good news arrives.

He is coming home. Her son Prince Torin Henry James Albert of Wales is coming home. She shares the news with her husband. From the corner of his moldy bedroom, a small voice asks a question out loud, " My brother, my baby brother is coming home?"

"Yes, darling, your brother is finally coming home."

"I love my brother."

"I know you do, my darling."

"I love him so much. I don't want to hurt him, but I do."

This kind of talk always makes the head of security nervous. He does not think the princess is harmless. She did strangle that kitten last week. He nods at one of the king's men who quietly escorts the princess out.

"Your daughter is as crazy as a bat," says the king to his queen.

"Indeed," says her majesty. "But my son is finally coming home. Agent Lancaster finally did his job. Him and the Canadians."

"He's a good man," says the king who hopes the agent received his message.

"Well, good man or not, he took his sweet time. And, he brought along a girl. Apparently he rescued one of Torin's girlfriends too."

"That boy will never change."

"No, never," agrees the mother. "Torin is quite the rascal, quite the lady's man, like his father. Well, before I captured you."

"Body and soul, my love. One look at you and I was done with the cavorting. Done with bachelorhood."

"Yes, yes you were, my king." The queen quickly glances at her image in the nearest full length mirror. Still got it, she thinks.

The king thinks out loud. "So, when he gets here, we speed up the marriage plans with the princess. That should help solidify our alliances, help our defenses."

"Yes," says the mother. "She is young, but eighteen is certainly old enough to marry."

"Indeed," says the king.