Through text ( Completed ) Lisa G!P

13) the Reason

Jennie's Pov.

I used to think that loving a mature person is a good thing . that is true, being with lisa was the best thing that ever happened to me. The only difference is that I was very innocent and young when I decided to marry her.

Lisa is the type of person who knows what she wants to do with her life. focused on the goal, because she said she didn't want her children to  experience the hardship and poverty
we both went through. I like it ! because I myself  also  want  whats  good for my future child.

She was 27 and I was 18 when we decided to get married a week after she ask me. A lot of things happened. I learned about  her condition, and accepted her wholeheartedly. I am happy when i'm with her.

The nine year age gap we had didn’t make a big deal to me because Hoyoen was also nine years older than me.

I love Lisa, and I know she loves me too. our relationship was perfect in the eyes of everyone around us. Lisa and i never fought. yes, there is a bit of misunderstanding but we never argue. one of lisa's traits that i like is that,She is so soft when it comes to me, if she feels that I am upset she will talk to me and she makes sure that we don't end up fighting.

She never made me feel that I should doubt her. She always makes me feel like, I have nothing to worry about. even though our life as a couple was not very luxurious, Lisa was able to provide for our needs.

As our relationship  went long. I noticed a lot. at young my age I notice the people around me and there's a lot of confusion enters my mind.

We are not the type of couple who always go on a date, or celebrate monthsary. I see other couples always giving flowers or surprising their partner. and I'll admit I'm upset because I've never experienced that.

Yes, lisa and i dated,  but only every anniversary and if it's my birthday or her birthday. I dont remember her giving me a flowers. I also never experienced watching a movie in the cinema with her .Don't get me wrong lisa never fails to let me feel that she loves me , at the best way she knows how.

She is very mature to the point that all she thinks about is, how our life would be better. You can't blame me either,  for my young age, I'm looking for things that people at my age normally do. As time goes on I feel like I’m not becoming comfortable with the situation, I feel like I'm too young to be married.

But I never complain. I continued to be a good wife to Lisa. I prepare everything she needs.  From the clothes she will wear . I cooked food for her i always make sure she eat healthy ,I cleaned our  house, I'm waiting for her to come home from work, and of course sex.

I love her she love me. but I can't deny that our relationship is boring.

In the first year of our marriage, I wanted us to have a child. I even put it on my bucket list,  that I want  to have child with her . but I don't know why , in the two years we've been together I haven't gotten pregnant. maybe destiny also wants me not to get pregnant first because maybe we're not really for each other.

When I heard what had happened to my mother in my panic, I was not able to call  to inform lisa. On my way home to Busan, I lost my phone. I really can't memorize lisa's number.  my extreme stress at that time, on how to provide the needs of my sisters.  I seemed to forgot that I had a wife who was worried about me. my responsibility to my sisters occupied my mind.

I chose not to tell lisa about my family, she once asked where my parents were. my answer to her was that they were both gone. good thing she didn't ask again. that's probably the reason why she didn't find me.

I can't deny that I hurt lisa , but I have no choice. I wanted to let her know my situation but I decided not to,  because I didn't want me and my siblings to be a burden to her.

I also did not tell my siblings that I was married. I know they will just force me to tell them what happened, so I just made them believe that hoyeon is the reason why I feel sad sometimes.

When I was able to save enough money, apart from what I was saving for my sisters' education. I immediately processed the divorce of my marriage to lisa. I know I was selfish in what I did to her, I hurt her. who am I to deprive her of the freedom she deserves.

What a coincidence ,I didn’t expect the person I was flirting with, in the text is also her.

Who would have thought that they were just one person. Lisa being a serious and hardworking person. while Lilly makes me feel like , she's a happy-go-lucky and flirtatious type.

I was very hurt when I saw that it's her. I feel like I'm jealous of myself.

The personality she showed me as Lilly? that's the personality I wanted to feel in her , when we were still together.

Lilly always updated me on what she was doing. the feeling that she always has time to check if I'm ok, even just in text. Not like Lisa before , she was so busy that I had to go through her secretary just to talk to her sometimes. and I was even more hurt when she gave me a flower.

It hurts me that I was her wife for 2 years  but she  didn't give me a flowers . But she gave one to a stranger she only know in the text.

But I'm not mad at her, just upset.

I also admit that I appreciate her accomplishments. despite what I did when i left her. She still included me in everything she accomplish.

But that still won't change all my decisions to continue the divorce. I love lisa,  and I'm not closed to the possibility that we will get back together.

But for now, I don't want to rush into a decision again. I'm just starting to reach my dream, I want to focus on myself first.

If we are really destined for each other, we will still be together in the end.