Nearing the end I was oh-so agonizingly aware of
Oh-so reluctant to prepare for,
I realized
My utter desperation
To cling hopelessly to you
And never let go
My pitiful desperation
To selfishly hold on to my delusions
for as long as I could
I was selfishly longing for you
to throw lies at me
To just pretend I was worth it
at some point
without concern for you
all for the sake of myself.
Now,
As if I woke up from it all,
I find that my only desire
Is to be forgotten
Perhaps we never should have met.
Maybe then this frantic desperation wouldn't be so palpable.
So pathetic.
Maybe then it wouldn't hurt so much
for you to care for me
in a way I don't want you to.
I find it so difficult,
even impossible, if I may be so bold,
to return to a world
where you care for me
in a way that so bitterly pierces my heart
rather than the way
I care for you,
and yet still find that I do
even though now I only wish for you
to be happy
and pretend I don't exist.
Don't wish for my return.
Let me be selfish
Just this once.
YOU ARE READING
~|:|~Poems~|:|~
PoetryJust a few poems I put together throughout quarantine because I had nothing better to do with my life. Quick warning, some of these deal with dark themes and mental illnesses, such as suicide and self-harm. If you are sensitive to these sorts of top...
