MHA react

The Story

What Was Supposed to Be a Normal Chat

The flashbacks are too much to bear. I'm sitting alone in an abandoned building, with just my thoughts. It all happened so fast. One minute my parents and I were chatting and the next there were people charging into my house and my parents were corpses. I had run away after the murderers left and found this abandoned building. It has now been three days since my parents died and all I've done is have flashbacks from what happened, and they won't stop. I cry myself to sleep every night. It's so hard to handle the fact that my parents are dead. I wish to just know that everything will be fine, that I'm going to be fine.

I want my parents back.

Why does everything I look at remind me of them. I can't – I just can't. It's too hard. Everything is too hard. The flashbacks get worse every time. The most recent one is so much clearer than the rest.

I hold my Mother and Father's hand as I cry. I had just witnessed the two of them be shot in the heart. Their last words to me were that they loved me and that they will always be with me.

Those words are stuck in my head and all that they do is remind me that I lost the two most important people in my life.

Because of all the flashbacks I have been experiencing I have found multiple ways to try and calm myself. These calming mechanisms are listening to music, creating scenarios in my head, taking deep breaths, and counting down from ten.

For the first coping mechanism, I choose a song to play on my phone and listen to it via headphones. I usually choose sad songs. For the second one, I basically come up with scenarios in my head and they always help me to relax. For the third one, I take deep breaths, in for four seconds and out for four seconds and I continue this process until I am calm. For the fourth and final one, I count down from ten and I continue this until I'm calm. I always use all of them, and so if one fails, I will use the next option. But if none of them work then I use a more concerning method: self-harm. Although this one is a last resort.

But anyway even though I have lost my parents, I am still attending school. I am trying to keep their death a secret, as if I don't keep it a secret and tell someone, I'll end up in foster care which I really don't want.

But because I am grieving, everything is so much harder, and I am so close to having a breakdown. It's so hard to keep my emotions buried down and if I keep burying them down my cup will overflow and there will be major consequences.

I'm trying so hard to keep everything secret and due to that I'm so overwhelmed. I'm hoping that no one has realised that something is wrong with me, but to be honest someone has probably noticed that something is wrong.

I'm currently in class and have been asked by my homeroom teacher Mr Akio to stay behind after class. I immediately freak out internally, but nod in understanding. To pass the time till the end of class my mind is coming up with multiple reasons as to why I've been asked to stay behind and spoiler alert they are all bad thoughts, so basically, I'm overthinking.

soon I hear the bell, which signals the end of class and school, and my nerves worsen. Like I was asked, I stay behind and wait in my seat until my classmates have all filed out. Once they all leave, I pack my things and once I'm done I stand up and take a singular deep breath to calm my nerves, which doesn't help in the slightest.

I slowly walk over to Mr Akio, my feet dragging across the floor, and my mind running 100 miles a second. Once I make it to my homeroom teachers desk, I sit in the chair that he has placed in front of his desk. I then place my bag down.

I look everywhere but him. There is silence for a few moments before he speaks up.

"Akira, do you know why I've asked you to stay behind?" Mr Akio asks with his usual monotone voice. My mind once again starts racing.