(Guide Us to) A Million Stars

5

COVID sucked. As I packed my suitcases, I thought about Taehyung and how I wasn't even able to say good-bye to him. Auntie stopped giving him lessons and I was denied access to her students' accounts. She didn't have his number and HYBE surely wouldn't give it to us. She said they had never directly contacted each other, only the company set up their lessons. If he really wanted to finish working on his song together, couldn't he get in touch with Auntie? Or maybe when she pressed that "leave call" button on the computer and the screen went black, I was out of sight, out of mind.

He, however, was not out of my mind. I went further down the rabbit hole of YouTube videos. I watched a lot of performances. Taehyung was a magnetic performer, my eyes always went to him. Of course all of the members had good stage presence, but there was something about him that drew me in. His tall, lean body danced effortlessly and he knew how to work the camera with a smoldering look. There were also videos of Taehyung doing aegyeo, grooving to music in a sexy way, really feeling it, being savage at times and even one called "Taekook" that made me turn it off right away.

One song, "Pied Piper," had me do a double take when I heard the lyrics.

"It's a bit dangerous but I'm so sweet

You called me, see?

I'm so sweet

Follow the sound of the pipe

I'm taking over you."

And they were taking over me. Unfortunately, not only could I not stop watching their "video clips, pictures, tweets, V app, bon voyage," as the song said, but I had met one of the members and that made it extra dangerous. I was desperate to do something, but what could I do?

I decided to call my mom. My parents raised me and my sister in a strict household. Growing up, we attended an all-girls, private school and TV, movies, and social media were prohibited. Once I went off to college and became an adult, they loosened the reins and I shot out of the gate running. I had plans to travel the world and live out my freedom and need for adventure. But they were about to be ruined. I was still mad at Auntie for making the decision to leave for both of us. So I asked my mom if there was any way I could stay in Seoul, secretly hoping she would offer to help out financially.

"Your father and I decided that you're an adult now. If you can figure out a living situation, that is affordable and sensible to you, then stay. Once you leave South Korea, who knows if you'll ever be able to return," she said, with tough love in her voice.

So I researched the cheapest living options in Seoul and even the studio apartments as big as a closet were pricey. My tutor salary would cover it, but I wouldn't have much money for food and transportation. I thought about getting a roommate but Auntie reminded me that would still cost the same because the apartment would be bigger. And no one was going to want to live with a stranger during a pandemic. Living in the countryside was affordable, but once the shutdown ended I wouldn't have enough money to commute to the city. And where was the adventure I yearned for if I lived on a farm?

Finally, I found the answer. I shared my excitement with Auntie as she was packing. "I can't believe we didn't think of this! 'Learning E' offers housing on top of the salary!"

A look of realization came over her face. "Ah. I forgot. I didn't like the ugly apartment they offered me so I bought my own."

After inheriting her husband's benefits, I could see how she had that option. "I forgot too since I knew I was going to live with you once I arrived here. There's my solution. I can stay!"

I pumped my fists in victory. So I probably still wouldn't see Taehyung unless he really was serious about me being his tutor, but at least I would be in the same city as him.