That Heart Of Gold | Levi X Reader

chapter twenty-nine

Hange.

The 14th Commander of the Survey Corps.

Your best friend.

You'd once spoken about what you'd do after the war was over. When Levi was injured, and you and Hange were sitting in front of a roaring fire. She'd said she hadn't though about it. Now, you were grateful she hadn't said anything. It would've been too much, knowing that her life ended shortly, and she didn't get to do what she wanted after the war.

"I'd definitely be at your tea shop everyday. To annoy the hell out of Levi, of course."

Your heart clenched.

How were you supposed to live without her? Her silly antics, her rambles and late night discussions about Titans, the way she annoyed Levi, the way she'd hug you when you were sad, the way she smiled, the way she acted like family to you.

You were devastated.

No. You were angry.

How many more people would you have to lose? You couldn't take it. First Sasha, now Hange? You couldn't take it.

Connie and Jean were still at your sides, staring aimlessly at the ground beneath them. They weren't holding onto you anymore.

You looked over at Levi. He couldn't even look at you.

Warmth spread throughout the left side of your stomach. When Levi pushed you into Connie, your wound must've opened.

You didn't feel the pain.

You didn't feel anything.

With your mind completely numb, you stood and walked over to a room at the back of the plane. When you'd inspected it before, there was nothing but empty wooden crates and boxes. They weren't going to be used for anything. The room was small, about half the size of the main cabin.

You opened the door and closed it behind you.

Then you stared at the floor, tears brimming your eyes once more. Hange...

You clenched your fists. Hange...

Something like a gasp mixed with a sob escaped your throat as you bent, picked up a crate, and hurled it at the wall. It broke into pieces.

You did it again, the noise of the wood breaking ricocheting throughout the room.

Again. Again. Again.

You kept going, throwing everything in your sight at the walls of the plane. You were so angry. How did this happen? Why didn't you just suck it up and take her place when you had the chance?

It should've been me.

It should've been me.

It should've been me.

You kept throwing, destroying the crates and boxes with everything you had. You were just so angry, heartbroken and lost.

By the time the last crate was broken, your breathing was heavy, the gash in your side leaking more warm blood, starting to soak through your shirt. You didn't care.

Hange...

The door behind you opened and closed. You knew who it was.

Neither of you said anything. He listened to your ragged breaths with a frown on his face. He'd never seen you so out of control.

He didn't want to approach you. For the first time in his life, he didn't know how to comfort you.

"She's gone," you breathed.