Style Oneshots - Catlala47

🌍 My Perfect World 🌍

Kyle: 20
Stan: ???
(Based on their birthdays and what time the story is set in.)

Word count: 1737

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"The more you try to forget someone. The more you start to think about them. The more you think about someone. The more you get attached.
                                                         -jcalex

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This oneshot is just a letter/poem Kyle wrote to Stan.

Enjoy! (?)

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Dear Stan,

I've been thinking a lot. Mostly about you, Stan, and how you know just how to put a smile on my face. I swear, you can walk into the room and my whole entire mood changes into an emotion I've never felt before.

You make me feel butterflies when I am supposed to be annoyed, you make me smile when I am supposed to be sad. You make me feel everything and more. Happiness and butterflies are just a little bit of the things you've made me feel.

You've made me feel true love. On that night, when my parents had just gotten done yelling at me for failing a class, and my brother was too scared to stand up for me, and my emotions ran so wild I ran away from home and wound up on your doorstep. You took me in, you comforted me, hugged me, nurtured me, gave me a sense of stability, and most importantly, you loved me. That was a night I wish to relive over and over again.

Every night when I close my eyes I see you. Your glowing blue eyes, your silky black hair, that random mole you have on your cheek, that peach fuzz you refuse to shave just to spite me, your hands, and how they felt intertwined with mine. Your heart, and how it felt when it was given to me.

I remember the day I met you. It was a day where I was annoyed, as usual, I know. I was so annoyed however, that when you came up to comfort me, I pushed you away. I'm sorry for pushing you away, Stan. I did it the day I met you and I did it when you needed me the most.

When I needed you, you were there for me. You always were. But when you needed me, I left you to fend for yourself. To deal with your problems all on your own. I'm so sorry for all the times I've left you alone. Nobody deserves to be discarded and thrown away by their best friend, someone who is supposed to look out for you.

I was selfish, and it kills me to know that I will never get the years I ignored you back. You deserve to have someone by your side, to have someone guide you and hold your hand. I was so, so selfish. And stupid.

I was scared. And I know that's no excuse, but please just hear me out. That day when you showed up at Cartman Burgers, I looked into your eyes and I saw someone whom I used to know. Someone I didn't know anymore. Your eyes were dark, and it hurt seeing you like that.

I pushed you away because I was scared of me making everything worse. I thought that if you were drinking while I was your friend, then maybe, just maybe, if I wasn't your friend anymore, you would stop?

It was a stupid idea, I know, and it was one that cost me my best friend, my lover, my everything.

You are the person who made me laugh more than I ever thought I could. Remember when you made that joke about how Cartman doesn't have a dad? Dude, I laughed so hard later that night just thinking about it. And I just wish I had never pushed you away, because I would love to hear more of your jokes. They could be about anything! Hell, I'll even let you joke about my mom. I just wanna hear your voice again. Your laughter, especially.