Need - Jude Bellingham

34

"Ayodele," Jude shook me gently, "Darlin wake up, I got you food."
I groaned, rolling over to no longer face him and then hearing his laugh as he turned me back around.
"I figured you wouldn't wanna see everyone but I bought you up a plate. You gotta eat, come on."

I smiled, my face still buried in my pillow, "I love you."
"I love you too Dele," he looked at me more seriously, "Are you alright to tell me what happened properly now?"
I nodded, sitting up against the headboard and taking a deep breath.

"Originally it was just me, Kian and Fadi. Fadi's the one you met. We were gonna find out where Jayden was and if it'd be a good time to confront him, if it was then we'd call the rest of his boys if need be."
Jude nodded for me to carry on, letting me know he was listening.

"We went to Jayden's first but only Lara was home. She told me he went to Josh's. I know where his flat is so we headed to his. Because I checked Jayden's, Fadi offered to check Josh's. From what I know, they were having a dead motive- just their boys and their girls. I think Fadi said something to someone, probably tried to move to a girl and then all the boys came out," I laughed lightly at that, the guy was a joker.

"Anyway, so Fadi's being chased down the tower block, it's six floors by the way. He calls us, telling us to get his and Kian's boys. We can tell he's running and he's shouting at us down the phone so Kian runs inside and leaves me to call their boys," I tried to keep my voice steady as the panic started to return, replaying the situation in my head.

"Take your time," Jude smiled encouragingly, placing the plate of food on my desk before sitting beside me and wrapping an arm around my shoulder.

"I let the boys know and they're on their way but I'm stressing 'cause I dunno what's happening with them two. So..." I winced, knowing his response, "I went inside."
He bit his lip, taking in a deep breath but not saying anything, letting me carry on.

"I heard them all arguing. One of Jayden's boys had a knife. I didn't go up any stairs or nothing but I heard them talking about it. I checked Kian's phone and saw the boys were outside so I left to go talk to them. I only spoke to one of the guys, name was Marcus and he was a bit of a prick, I'll be real."

"Anyway, them lot have all gone inside and it's mad kicking off, that's when I called you."
"You could've called me earlier you know? When you first started panicking. I woulda been there straight away," he kissed my hair as I leant into his shoulder.
"I know, I just wasn't thinking."
"I'm glad I was the person you called though," he smiled smugly, causing me to laugh and roll my eyes, "Alright, sorry carry on."

"So after I-" I laughed awkwardly, "After I hung up on you, I might've gone back inside?"
"Of course you did," he seemed only a little annoyed, thank god.
"I just had a bad feeling. If something happened and I didn't even try to stop it, I'd feel so guilty. I was the reason all of them were even there in the first place. It-"

"It weren't your fault though Dele," he interrupted, a hand going through my braids, "It really wasn't. You need to stop thinking it is."
"A boy got stabbed tonight," I whispered, more telling myself than Jude, "He could die and that's on me."
"But it's not darlin, honestly it's not. I ain't even just saying that to try make you feel better. It could be Jayden's fault for starting on Aryan in the first place, or Fadi for tryna move to Josh's girl, or Marcus for even going in there and getting loud. Nah scrap that, whoever pulled out the fucking knife and stabbed Marcus, he's the one to fucking blame, alright?"

I nodded slowly, taking in what he had said, "You know this would usually be a situation where I'd go off on my ones and smoke?"
"But you haven't and we're talking about it," he smiled, "I'm proud of you, in the least patronising way possible."
I laughed at his words, moving to lay on top of him, head in his lap and arms around his waist as he kept his back up against the headboard, running a hand through my hair.