Betrayal - Book 3 of Guardians Saga - EDITED

CH 14.2 Whose Dream?

Alex awoke with a start. Rough beam walls surrounded her, and the only light she could see was from a candle in the room's corner. She looked wildly around the log cabin, at the thick layer of dust on the floor, and the faint smell of smoke from a campfire. heart pounding, desperately looking for something familiar. She found Gabe lying next to her, and she remembered what had happened, what she had done. Guilt knotted her stomach. She carefully swung her legs over the bed so as not to disturb the sleeping figure.

At least I'm still dressed. All I have to do was put on my shoes and I'm home free. I'll fly around and if I'm lucky, I'll be Called elsewhere. If not that, then being dumped in the middle of an ocean is a good start.

"Where are you going?" Gabe asked innocently, his eyes twinkling in the dim ligh. He pushed back the covers and sat up, his muscular frame silhouetted against the headboard.

Alex hesitated for a moment. Her heart raced as her gaze shifted between Gabe's expectant expression and the cracked window overlooking the pond. "I...I..." she began, but her carefully constructed lies stuck in her throat at the sight of his sweet, trusting face.

Her shoulders slumped as tears welled up in her eyes, and jagged words of apology stumbled out instead. "I'm sorry I did that to you. Used you like that. I miss Gabe so much; hurt so much inside and out; that I wanted to feel something other than pain. Your love is so kind, so soothing and sincere, that when you said you were useless, I plunged into it. That's no excuse, but it's all I've got."

Gabe listened silently with an astonished expression on his face, then reached up and tenderly guided her back down on the bed.

"First of all, I am Gabe. Second, I don't recall any 'using' going on. Third, I'd say I had the better end of the deal."

"But..." Alex's voice failed her as her throat tightened. She bit her lip and tried to keep her composure.

"The way I see it, I'm the same Gabe, up to a point. It's like you were in love with me when I was younger, then we were separated."

I'm not the only one deceiving myself. Makes me feel a little better.

She squirmed as she realized there was still one thing she was holding back.

It isn't only for my sake, but for the sake of this Alex and Rile and their children...and I can't take the burden of this secret.

Her voice shook as she spoke. "There's something else I must tell you. But you have to swear to not tell anyone else, especially Alex or Rile. It could destroy their relationship like it did mine and Gabe's."

Gabe didn't say anything, eyes full of worry.

"Swear or I won't say a thing and we're done and I'm gone. I can't go through this again. I won't endanger this timeline's Rile and Alex."

Gabe answered immediately, "I swear."

"You have to believe that I didn't know this for a long time," she said with urgency.

"I believe you." Gabe tucked her hair behind her ear tenderly with a deformed finger.

"Those powers that you experienced, they're addictive and misleading. If you're feeling anything for me, it's not real, just a side effect." Alex pulled away. "It's not just because I relieved the pain in your hands. The power is euphoric. Makes you think you're in love with me. You're not. Trust me."

There was silence as Gabe pondered her statements, looking down at his twisted fingers.

"You see why you can never tell Alex or Rile. Alex probably doesn't know. I didn't know until Brockner told me. But we can't risk it. I'm sorry to burden you with this, but like I said, I can't go through this again."