to all the people i've loved before | Ninjago Bruise

15 - i see the light

Something my parents taught me when I was young was that there was only ever one person out there for you. One person you should give all your support and affection to. You should save your 'firsts' for them to save you from heartbreak. But if there was ever anything I've learnt over the last month is that you can't just wait to find out who your 'soulmate' is. I've always found myself to be the hopeless romantic type and avoiding feelings for those I really want to be with in the moment has never been possible for me. I think my parents have come to terms with that since they were happy when I told them about my boyfriend.

I've been through enough relationships now to know how things are supposed to be, or at least I thought I knew. There's still a lot I have to learn and there's a lot I've already learnt going into my second proper relationship. One of which is knowing exactly what I need and deserve. That's mostly thanks to Cole though.

Everything is going perfectly. We spend pretty much every moment of every day together, watching movies, going shopping, training together, and playing video games - which I always win. It feels so fun and natural, as if we were always meant to be. I can't get over how much I genuinely care for him and how he cares for me. We're inseparable.

I'm so obsessed with him, I can't put it into words.

At breakfast this morning, he surprised me with a reservation at one of the fanciest restaurants in the city, which made me excited at the time but now, sitting in my bedroom pondering, I'm feeling a mix of emotions. Am I really excited or just extremely nervous? Perhaps both?

'Nonsense' by Sabrina Carpenter is playing on the speaker while I dance around the room, attempting to psych myself up, not caring about whether anyone can hear me or not.

My one problem, however, is that no matter how excited I am for tonight, there isn't a single thing for me to wear. Going too fancy or too casual would be wrong.

Twirling around my room like a little girl, I barely noticed the knock at my door. Jumping in surprise, I glanced around frantically, trying to spot something I can wear throughout the piles of clothes I've made.

"Uh-" I yelp, "Cole! I'm not ready yet!"

The door opens slightly, a blonde boy popping his head around. He gave me a smile as he noticed my little sigh of relief. Quickly coming into the room, he shuts the door and glances around my - pretty messy - bedroom.

"Looks like you've been busy," he chuckles.

I groan, "Please help me, I don't know what to wear."

"Why are you asking me?" he questions, "I know nothing about fashion."

"Neither do I!"

"You surely know more than me," he shrugs, a grin plastered across his face, "I'll try to help but I can't promise it'll look good."

"Thank you," I breathe another sigh of relief as I start to pick up shirts I'd thrown on the bed ten minutes prior.

Lloyd begins searching through my clothes, presumably trying to find something that matches or looks somewhat right. I look myself, but nothing comes to mind when I pick up my endless amount of sweaters and jeans. The only thing I can really make out is my old suit but there's no way I'm wearing what I wore on my first date with my ex to my first proper date with Cole. It's a very nice suit though.

"Where are you going tonight?" Lloyd asks, taking a good look at one of my many blue hoodies.

"Harvon's," I reply quietly, staring at a pair of jeans I'd likely thrown at the back of my wardrobe and forgotten about.

"Dude, that's like the fanciest restaurant in the city!" Lloyd exclaims, smiling brightly. His excitement fills me with joy for a split second but doesn't last long when I remember what 'fancy' implies.