CHAPTER THIRTY
haven't had a dream in a long time
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𝐖hen Josephine turned nine years old, her father, Jack Toretto gave her a key replica of his famous stock car he used on the tracks. He told her that once she was old enough, she was going to be the one to take the wheels from him. That she was going to surpass him, become an even better racer, faster, stronger, and little Josephine, well, that was all she ever wanted. She wanted to be everything about her dad. His biggest fan, as he liked to think.
That was the last birthday that she spent with him. After that he died, and the car she was supposed to have burnt to nothing along with him in it. Since then she vowed not to want something more than she should.
As for her mother... Josephine couldn't remember much about her, truth to be told. Milena Toretto died after she bore the youngest of them. That was all she knew and all her brothers ever told her. The topic of their mom often becomes a passing thought in the Toretto home. It was as if they were scared, maybe even terrified, or maybe the mere mention of the once beautiful and kind mother's name would bring them to tears.
All she had of her mom was the stories people had told her. And her eyes. Every time they look into her eyes, they see the strong woman they knew and somebody that Josephine merely sees as a stranger. Because she didn't know her. Josephine and Mia never got to know Milena and maybe that was the root of their bittersweet feelings about their mother.
Sometimes, she hated those people who told her stories. It was unfair. It was unfair that they had all of those memories with her own mother and she didn't even know what she sounded like or how she looked like in person. The pictures and stories will never be enough and perhaps that's why it makes it so hard to look at them.
It never ends. It only starts every single time like whenever she looks at her hands, she thinks of her father. When she stands in the mirror, her mother looks back. Josephine had never known her mother. So maybe she had never known herself either. Because behind everybody's stories was their mother's story. But where does hers begin if not with her mother? Doesn't it should be?
How could she be a mother when she didn't even feel the love of one? It terrified her so much that it was almost sickening. Her pregnancy scared her more than she could admit. And in these dying times, Josephine so badly wished that her mother was by her side, telling her that she was going to be a great mother or whatever parents say when their daughter's pregnant and all that. She wasn't quite sure.
"What're you thinking, baby?" Her thoughts came to an abrupt stop when she heard Brian O'Conner's voice next to her, sounding gentle and kind as always. She looked at him, azure eyes warmly gazing back at her.
"What if I become a bad mom?" Josephine blurted out before she could think. Immediately, his face pulled into a small frown, disagreement clear on the lines forming on his forehead. She shook her head quickly, dismissing it with a dry chuckle. "Never mind that."
"Jo... Look at me," Brian said lowly, carefully trailing his hands on her shoulder to make him look at her. Her lips quivered, noticing the way he was staring at her like she was the best thing that ever happened to him in his whole life. "You're going to be such a great mother, Josephine Toretto."
"How do you know that?'
"Because I know you."
Josephine pursed her lips, her usual bravado momentarily giving way to vulnerability. She realized just how much she truly loved this man in front of her. Even after all the things they had endured, he was the only thing that remained constant in her life. She let out a quiet laugh, a beautiful sound that subconsciously made Brian smile widely as he stared at her so carefully, so lovingly that even the goddess of love would be jealous. His thumb brushed against a single teardrop on her cheeks.
YOU ARE READING
Fast Lane ━━ Brian O'Conner ¹
Fanfiction❛ we were a 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆 love, too wild to last. too rare to break. ❜
