MELAMINA THE QUEEN

CHAPTER 36

BUSISIWE SEIPHUMA

Morena was once a loving and caring husband. He was obsessed with me and gave me everything I asked for. He was my pillar of strength in times of need and my best friend. Year after year I was sure that I chose the right man to spend the rest of my life with. But things changed when he suddenly came home late, missed scheduled dates, missed the kids’ school events and blame everything on his workload. I thought that it was really work until I found out that he was cheating. At first he was decent enough to try and hide it but as time went on, he didn’t give a fuck about his hoe ways. He didn’t care to hide them. He wanted me to find out. To know that he was cheating on me but still stay in the relationship because I was too ashamed to go back home and tell everyone that my marriage failed simply because I couldn’t handle just mere infidelities.

My father is known for having a short temper when you mess with his family. So it’s not a surprise that he has pulled me outside and is prompting me to tell him everything about my failed marriage. The look he gives me just makes me so emotional. I find myself tearing up. He hugs me and I just break down in his arms. I don’t know when was the last time I actually received this kind of attention from my father. It’s not even his fault. It’s just that I have been so distant with my family. I don’t even come to visit them unless I am dropping off the kids if they wanna visit for holidays.

“Talk to me, Sqalo SamaNdosi. What is it? You know I can’t help if you don’t use your words.” His tone is so soft. It just triggers a lot of emotions. I tell him every single detail while sobbing. I can hardly hear what I am saying but it seems like he can hear me because he is nodding. He slowly pushes me away from his chest and clears his throat. “You know that I love you, right?”

“Yes baba.”
“You were proof of my fertility and you will forever be the apple of my life and my first love. You are a part of me. You were literally made by me. So you are mine. If anyone hurts you, it means they hurt me. Sqalo, I will ask you a few questions. Have I ever cheated on your mother?” I shake my head. My father is so obsessed with Jabu. He doesn’t even look at other women with longing or lust in his eyes. “Have I ever abused her physically or emotionally?” I shake my head. “She and I have been married for 39 years. Have you ever seen her cry because of me?” I shake my head.

“You are an adult, Busi. You know that the only acceptable tears from your partner are tears of pleasure or laughter. Nothing else. I have treated your mother like a queen, not just because of my unconditional love for her. Another reason is because I am setting standards for you and your siblings. You girls need to see how your men should treat you. It’s no rocket science. If you choose to marry a woman, it means you are choosing her out of the millions of women out there. She is special and she should be cherished forever.

“Marriage doesn’t have an expiry date. Even if your partner dies, you can choose to stay married to them and never move on. What you must know mtanami is that not all men cheat. That’s just an excuse women use when they want to stay in toxic relationships. Destroying an already worn out house and building a new one can be scary if you’re too comfortable in that leaking house, but change can be good. You matter and your feelings matter. But think about your baby girl. Would you want her to endure the same fate as you in the future? Do you want Thabang to treat women the same way his father is treating you? The fact that you still stay even if you can see that things are bad means you are enabling him. Is this a great example you are setting for them?”

I shake my head. My father’s words hit hard because I know they are true. I want my children to look up to me but there are some things that I don’t want them to copy. Like how I had to endure this crazy behavior from my husband. “How do I start over, baba?” I ask because I don’t know where to go from here.

“You are my child, Busisiwe. Even when you’re old and grey, I will never get tired of helping you. Right now you need me more than ever. You can either come back home and stay there until you get back on your feet or I can rent out an apartment for you. Those are the only two options available for you. You are my child. Feeding you is not a burden. It’s my responsibility and I love it when I am able to provide for you guys.”

I take a deep breath and think about my options. As much as I want my own space, I need the emotional and physical support from my parents. I am not strong enough to stay alone with two kids. I am still going through a lot. I need to heal without appearing like a fuckin mess to my kids. “I don’t mind staying with you guys.”

He smiles and hugs me. “I will tell Kuhle’s people to go to your house and collect everything that belongs to you. I don’t want you going back to that hell.” He stands up. “Now that’s out of the way, I need to deal with that cockroach that thinks he can mess with my child and get away with it.” He heads inside the house and I quickly follow him. My brothers are already sitting on either sides of Morena who looks like he is seconds away from pissing on his pants.

“I don’t want to spill blood in my in-laws yard, so let’s go outside.” He orders and Gcino and Lele drag Morena out of the Mkhize yard. They continue dragging him down the road until they are maybe 200 meters away from the gate. My father takes off his coat and t-shirt. He places them on the ground and looks at Morena in disgust. “When I am done with you, you will never want to see a woman near you ever again.” He gives him one mean punch that lands Morena on the ground. Ndosi kicks him and Morena just wails like a pathetic spineless man. Why did I allow myself to be hurt by this person again?