Investigations-Chapter 80

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[On monitor]

Neelix is in the Mess hall, in his chef's outfit.

"Good day, Voyager and welcome to A Briefing With Neelix. It's a catchy title, isn't it? I'll be coming to you each and every day with news of general interest. Interviews with our fascinating crew members. Musical performances. Recommendations for new holodeck programmes. And of course, previews of upcoming meals. Everything from Hlaka soup to Zabee nuts. A Briefing With Neelix will help you stay informed about ship's activities, er, keep you abreast of your colleague's accomplishments and broaden your knowledge about a wealth of subjects. But most of all, it will make you feel good, because what you see here will always be the most uplifting, optimistic view of everything that happens on our ship. After all, as your morale officer, isn't it my job to bring a little joy into everyone's day? Hmm? Captain Janeway has agreed to appear on the show with regular updates about the ship's progress, and Commander Chakotay will commend outstanding crew members. So snap to and keep those boots polished to a shine. You never know when you might be featured on A Briefing With Neelix. Ready, Ensign?" Neelix asked.

"All set, Neelix." Baytart replied out of view.

"In just a moment, an amazing talent. Ensign Pablo Baytart will astound you with his juggling ability. He'll keep PADDs, hyposprays, even phasers in the air for minutes at a time. But before that, what makes people feel better than a little romance? And what Lieutenant in a gold uniform was recently huddled in the Mess Hall with what crewman in blue having a very intimate conversation over a carafe of Silmic wine? Well, I'd never name names, but you know who you are. Best wishes to a handsome pair of lovebirds. And now, ladies and gentlemen, Ensign Pablo Baytart." said Neelix.

[Doctor's office]

"Ladies and gentlemen, Ensign Pablo Baytart. Well? What did you think?" Neelix asked.

The EMH turns off the monitor before Baytart's juggling act appears.

"I'm a doctor, not a performer. I don't have time for such nonsense." said the Doctor.

"I can see Hints for Healthful Living becoming a very popular segment, Doctor." said Neelix.

"I don't think so." said the Doctor.

"You'd be lifted to a whole new level in the crew's eyes. They'd hang on your every word. You'd enjoy a, a popularity, a, a celebrity that you've never known before." Neelix said.

"I would?" the Doctor asked.

"You don't have to answer right away. Just think about it." said Neelix.

[Corridor]

"Ah, Mister Kim! Just the person I wanted to see." said Neelix.

"See you later." said Harry.

A crewman walks off.

"Did you watch A Briefing With Neelix this morning?" Neelix asked.

"Uh, yes, yes, I did." said Harry.

"Is there something about the programme you disliked?" Neelix asked.

"I'm not sure I care for all the frosting." Harry replied.

[Turbolift]

"Frosting?" Neelix asked.

"Deck four. Recipes, music, jugglers. It's sort of like a steady diet of dessert, which is fine, but pretty soon you want some meat and potatoes." said Harry.

"You do?" Neelix asked.

"When I was in school, I was editor of the Academy newspaper for a year. I monitored subspace transmissions. I got reports on some of the first activity by the Maquis against the Cardassians. I wrote an editorial about it, and the students became polarised on the issue. They debated the pros and cons, and gained an insight into the entire history of the political rebellion. Now, that's the power of journalism." Harry said.

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