For As Long As It Takes (boyxboy) (Editing)

Heartbreaker Logan

Logan

(A/N: The POV you've all been waiting for :) You're welcome.)

I felt terrible and even though this wasn’t about me, I couldn’t help but feel guilty.

He told me this would happen, he did. I couldn’t let him do it though, I wouldn’t. What was I supposed to do, let him stay and take the beating? Stay and let him be killed? He’d be the dead one right now.

No, I wanted to be selfish. I wanted him to be safe, here, with me. I couldn’t lose him, so I didn’t let him go back even though I knew he wanted to.

But seeing the way he was now... I'd never seen Tony like this before. The way his eyes were just glazed over, not caring about anyone or anything he came in contact with, it was scary.

I didn’t know what to do. Say sorry? I wasn’t sorry that he wasn’t dead, but I knew that’d be implying that I was okay with his mother dying.

I know I should’ve tried to comfort him. He needed me more than ever, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I didn’t know the right words to say because nothing would make it better, nothing would make it right.

So I avoided him and the conversation altogether, which in the end was just hurting him even more. I love him, I do, but I know there was nothing that would make it better.

I was still shocked by his mother’s death, and the whole picture situation was nagging me in the back of my mind no matter how badly I just wanted to ignore it and pretend I’d never seen it.

Everything I’d heard him say to Josh and Nick at lunch, to my mom last night, everything he’d been trying to explain to me, the picture.. Nothing made sense anymore.

Even Josh was starting to think something fugazy was going on, and I knew Josh would always take my side, even if I was in the wrong.

He said he’d ‘do some digging’ for me because I just couldn’t. I couldn’t deal with everything alone and just thinking that Tony was dealing with ten times this in his head alone hurt me.

No matter how badly I wanted to believe him, I didn’t - more like wouldn’t - believe it.

The picture was… well there was no room for bullshit. He couldn’t have just so happen to be in the picture with her.

It wasn’t an accident, I knew that much. But there were things that bothered me.

Firstly, I know Tony was playing beer bong and had to strip down to his boxers for the game. He was already basically naked when I’d dragged him upstairs, I know that.

Secondly, the alarm clock in the picture showed the time to be two something in the morning. When I’d left him in the bedroom it’d been about one. He’d been dozing off when I’d left and was completely passed out when I got back.

When I woke up and tumbled back upstairs to lay down in bed with him, he was alone and still asleep.

Some small details bothered me as well. One being that he doesn’t sleep on his back, ever. It makes him have nightmares and feel uncomfortable. He was already drunk and not feeling well, so he definitely wouldn’t have been laying on his stomach.

One of the things that bothered me the most was thinking about the person that took the picture in the first place. Who the fuck would do that?

There were no other pictures of couples making out or in bed together. Why Tony? Why my boyfriend with another girl?

Ex, I reminded myself. Ex-boyfriend.

A picture of two naked people? That’s sick, and perverted. These were someone’s children. But passing it around to the school? That was just wrong.