America Doing Basic White Girls Things.

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Just read the whole thing in a basic white girl voice. Shhhhh, it's better off that way, darling.


'Murcia: *in a mocking teenage girl voice* Oh my god, my shoes totally do NOT match my shirt. That is SSSSOOOO ratchet.

*walking down the street, Starbucks in one hand and, his IPhone in the other hand* I am on FLEEK.

*looking on the mirror* DDDDAAAAMMMMNNNN, my eyebrows are on FLEEK.

*walks past the mirror and stops to admire himself* DDDDAAAAAAAAAMMMMNNNN, I look on FLEEK.

*doing squats at the gym* DDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMNNNN, my body is on FLEE- POINT. My body is on point. Betcha thought I was going to say fleek again. Haha, NOPE- *is interrupted by a certain song*

Oh

M

GEEEEE.

ISH MAH JAM!!!!! *starts singing and twerking*

MAH MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL DAH BOYS TO DAH YARD AND THEY'RE LIKE, IT'S BETTAH THAN YOURS. DAMN RIGHT, IT'S BETTAH THAN YOURS. I COULD TEACH YAH, BUT I'D HALF TAH CHARGE!!!!!

Iggy: *comes out of the dressing room* *raises an eyebrow*

'Murica: This is my work out, IGGY!!!!! *changes songs and continues dancing* NOW WATCH ME WHIP *whips* NOW WATCH ME NAE NAE *nae nae's*

Iggy: *eyebrow grows*

'Murica: *failing miserably at the dance* DO THE STANKY LEG. DO THE STANKY LEG.

Iggy: *le eyebrow keeps growing, breaking through the ceiling*

'Murica: *snaps his fingers and walks out of the room, making sure to sway his hips as he does so*

*at home now, laying in bed*

I wonder what I'd look like with Kylie Jenner lips? *sighs* *calls up Iggy* Artie?

Artie: Alfie, it is almost 3am *groans*

Alfie: But.....Yeah.....It's like, all I want to do is like, cuddle, you know?

Artie: Alfie, go to bed.

Alfie: Ugh, What-ev-ah.

*in the morning, getting ready for work*

*puts on a crop top, leggings, an infinity scarf, ugg boots, and aviator glasses*

Damn.

I.

Am.

On.

Wait for it.


Wait for it.









FLEEEEEEEEK.

Hahahahahahahhaha, SWAG! *snaps his fingers and vanishes into a cloud of pink, blue, and gold sparkles*.

Admin:.....Um.....Yeah. Basically the girls in my school. I'm half basic, btw....Sorrynotsorry.

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