Harry Styles Imagines

Reversed part 4

Life hasn't felt any different in the sense of I haven't had to stop from doing things that I would normally do. I was at Cobi Q's having a drink with one of my co-workers Jasmine. We're close but not as close as I am with Candice. But she's one that's good to keep around when Candice is busy with Josh. She decided to take a few weeks off and be on the tour with him. I'm all about traveling because that is fun. But I just know for me personally that I can't & won't drop my responsibilities just to be with my man. At the end of the day traveling & touring is his livelyhood, my job as an contracting specialist is my livelyhood. I have to get mine & he get his. I just don't believe in staying months. But again that's just where I am in life. Some people can do that...more power to you.

"So how are you & and the famous guy?"

"He's good. " I said hoping so.

"How is that going? You don't seem.......well you seem like you don't know what's going on?"

"That's cause I don't. In the beginning things were going well. We stayed in communication. Then things just started to......."

"I've seen what people are saying about you.....& I tell you people are a trip.....all the stories just make me love it even in more...all the shade I tell you..."

"I know tell me about it. I didn't really think about all of the outcome all of what came out of meeting him. I just didn't expect him to take a then interest in me. I mean come on....I am who I am....so"

"A then interest?"

"Yeah, then because I really don't think we are going to go anywhere. I feel like we're just going to be friends"

"Why? What happened to a few weeks ago? You were just content & confident about Yall situation. What changed?"

"To be honest it can only be one of three things"

"And they are?"

"Well for one....I'm just not to sold on him. It's like a instinct  I have like....can I really trust him. Does he really like me for me?"

"The man is on tour...you can't expect him to be the normal boyfriend that's always available. If that's what you need sweetie let's get you out of here, pack your suite case up, get you on the plane....I'll see you in 3 months, I'll see you when you come back & I'll ask you did you figure out what you needed to figure out"

"But see here's the thing it's not the tour situation that doesn't bother me. I'm good with that. I love the separation. I want him to grow fond of me. I love how absence makes the heart grow fonder. But I feel like in the beginning it's so shakey. I don't feel like he thought carefully about my feelings. So it's hard for me to trust if this man is really going to look out for my best interest. which leads me to my second point. I have noticed that they have been getting a lot of opportunities to do & be at certain multicultural events in other words black Urban radio event interviews. Like nobody is dumb. Nobody in that field has ever & isn't normally beating down your door or hitting your phone up to hit the spot and do an interview.....seriously come on..........now the issue where Harry plays I just don't see enough on his part where......ok put it like this if it wasn't for tour being a distraction I feel like he would have felt compelled to have to say something. But even on these social networks......these trends.....I feel & I know what should be done......in our world & in our society of where we live our backround of our lives it's so much harder. Nobody will ever understand the day to day struggle over the littlest, tiniest things us women & us a women of color....not just black....whether mixed, Puerto Rican, Dominican, African, Mexican whatever.....the point is history is recycling right now....i get on Twitter & it's like a complete race fight. Back & forth. You see it in the news, an innocent life taken away just to send a bigger message....let's have a war again in our streets, let's hurt these niggas.....im just being real. That's what going on. So my concern is what me and him just attention for him & the band to touch bases in areas they never did before....they are at the point where I've done it all....what's one thing we haven't done....yeah let's focus a little more on your color numbers..."