Rejects // Punk Luke Hemmings

>Chapter Thirty-Nine<

I sat on the couch, wrapped in a blanket with a bag of microwave popcorn settled on my lap. My head was leaned against my mom's shoulder as "The Princess Diaries," my favorite childhood movie, played out on the screen before us.

"Kara," mom whispered as the end credits began to roll. It was late night now and I was honestly half asleep.

"Yeah mom?" I mumbled and let my eyes close.

"Can I talk to you about something?"

My eyes opened once again, and I sat up, looking at her. "Yeah. What is it?"

She hesitated, as if what she was about to say was going to upset me. "It's actually about you..." The way she brought her knees up to her chest and laid her forehead against them made her look much younger for some reason.

I swallowed hard and looked at the blanket wrapped around my shoulders. "W-what about me?"

"Not anything in particular," she started. "But I never get to talk to you anymore. I miss my Kar Bar..." She let out a sigh, and guilt overtook me.

I hadn't realized how much time I spent out of the house until now. I went to school, then usually went to Luke's place right after. I normally got home around nine or ten, did what homework I had left, then maybe got something to eat and went to bed. I hardly saw mom anymore, and apparently it was starting to impact her.

"It's just... Before I say anything, I want you to know how proud I am of you for getting out of your comfort zone. I love that you have friends now that you can hang out with and talk to when you need them. And I'm so happy that you have Luke now and you're happy for once...

"But like I said, I never get to see you anymore. You're either at school or Luke's place which, I'll admit, is very adorable," she looked at me with a small smile. But I thought I also saw tears pooling in her hazel eyes. "You're never home anymore, and I feel like I'm missing out on my only baby girl's life..." She seemed to break at the words, and a tear slipped down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away, but I immediately leaned over again and wrapped my arms around her.

"I'm sorry mom," I whispered and felt a lump start to form in my own throat. "I-I didn't realize that you felt like this..."

"I didn't want to say anything because you finally have friends and a boyfriend and you just seem so happy all the time. You get up so well in the mornings, you have a smile on your face, and you talk so much more than you used to. And I didn't want to ruin that..." She hugged me back, burying her face in my shoulder.

"Still. I don't want you to be lonely mom! We just moved halfway around the world. That's the last thing you need right now," I closed my eyes and tried to take deep breaths to keep from crying.

"But after your dad-" she choked back a sob. "After your dad, I wouldn't forgive myself if I ever tried to take away your happiness..."

My heart stopped in my chest and time seemed to freeze. She mentioned him... Since when was she ever alright with mentioning him?

Mom and I had been on our own for my entire life, and we'd made it, though we may have struggled at some times. But the seldom times she ever talked about dad, I could just tell how heartbroken she still was over him.

"I've never told you this Kara, but I need to tell you now," she continued and sniffled yet again. "When your father was in the hospital after the accident, on life support and in a coma, I went to visit him. You were born not too long after that, but I remember you just wouldn't stop kicking me that day. Well, I was sitting beside him, holding his hand, when you started throwing a fit inside me...

"So I took his hand and I placed it over you, and two things happened..." She whimpered into my shoulder as I tried to comfort her the best I could. "You stopped kicking Kara. As soon as his hand was on my stomach you were still, like you went to sleep. Until I had you a week and a half later, of course. But you know what else happened?"

"What happened mom?" Tears threatened to choke me at this point.

"H-he woke up. He felt you and he woke up. I watched as his fingers moved a bit, then his eyes fluttered open. I noticed that his pupils were dilated and as soon as the light hit them they shrank to pinholes. Funny, the things we remember sometimes, huh?" She gave a weak laugh and wiped at her eyes. "But Kara... He looked at me. For a solid twenty seconds we just watched each other. There was happiness in his eyes though. Like he knew something amazing was about to happen.

"He opened up his mouth, whispered how much he loved us both, th-then the monitor went b-blank..." Her words were clipped short by the fresh wave of tears that racked her frame. I finally couldn't handle the pressure anymore and let myself fall apart there on the couch.

Why hadn't she shared this story with me earlier? What was the point if I was going to find out sooner or later?

But... Hadn't she just been waiting for the right time to tell me? I couldn't blame her for that. I couldn't blame her for anything. She couldn't have done anything. She did her best to raise me well, and I appreciate every little thing she had done for me.

"Mom..." I whispered. "I'm so, so sorry....."

"He left us happy though. For that I'm thankful for. And his injuries from that crash were so bad. His suffering was at least shortened..." Mom sat up again, her eyes puffy with tears and her nose red and slightly runny. I hated seeing her like this.

"Why are you telling me all this now mom?" I asked quietly, wiping away my own tears.

"Because I want you to know that I love how happy Luke is making you, but I still want you to be careful with him. I want you to be happy for a long time to come, so if you think he's the one that'll make you happy, he's got my full support. If he hurts you though I'll be on him faster than you can blink."

I couldn't help but laugh a bit at the scenario. My mother, sitting on the couch with me with her puffy, tear soaked eyes and fierce threat.

"I know mom, and that's what makes you so amazing. You are always there for me. Dad would've been happy with how you've raised me. Also, rest assured I'll be careful with him. He is my first boyfriend after all..."

••••••••••••••••••••

A/N

So um I was crying while writing this....... I don't know about you all but that was a pretty feelsy chapter.

To clear things up, Kara's dad was in a car crash just before she was born. He passed away in the manner I described in this chapter, hence why Kara told Luke earlier in the story that she could never miss what she had never known.

ALSO!! I need you all to tell me if j have any plot/detail/character inconsistencies throughout this story. It's jut gotten very long as you can see and it can be a struggle to remember all specific or pretty main things while also having to plan out the rest of it. I appreciate it SO MUCH and you can honestly just be like, "Um, yeah. That's wrong." But make sure you tell me what I need to change it to. I'll obviously do an intense revision process once it's done but.... Yeah. Thanks for any help!

Also, thank you more than life for over 35.5k reads!!! Honestly, I don't deserve you all. You are all so supportive and amazing and just... I fricking love every single one of you. I hope you know that. I've gotta do some homework now, so I love you again, have an amazing day/night, and make sure to stay awesome!! (Note: in the accompanying pic, I know it's the girl's hand that's all hooked up to the hospital stuff, but we're gonna pretend it's Kara's mom holding her dad's hand before he died :') okay?)

~CC <3