Terrified

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Melody's POV

I drove faster than I ever have before as I made my way down the winding Georgia Road. I had an idea of where I was going, but I wasn't completely sure I was going the right way. The sun was extremely bright as I looked for things that seemed familiar. My heart was pounding loudly in my ears and it felt like I was going to have one of my attacks any minute. Reaching over into my bag in the passenger seat with one of my hands, I dug through my purse feeling around for the small inhaler. It was extremely hard to keep concentrated on the road with all the worry about Norman and the trouble I was having breathing. Finally my hand grasped onto the small plastic frame and I brought it to my mouth and inhaled, gaining my breath back. It didn't help completely, but it was better than nothing. If I wasn't right and Norman wasn't here, I don't know what I would do. Coming to the end of the road, I saw the small dirt pathway that Norman took me down once before. I felt a little relief knowing I had went the right way. Taking a deep breath, I turned my car onto the dirt path and made my way through the woods. I could only go so far until the trees started to get closer together, so I stopped, grabbed my bag, and walked the rest of the way on foot. Finally coming to a clearing, the field opened up in front of me. I placed a hand over my eyes to block the blinding rays of the sun. The field still blossomed with bright purple flowers as I let my eyes scan towards the old picnic table in the middle of it. My heart about popped out of my chest when I saw there sitting on the bench someone sitting...someone that looked just like Norman. Taking a deep breath, I made my way over to the table. Taking heavy steps, a sudden wave of relief flew over me when I confirmed it was indeed Norman. He was wearing a black V-neck and black jeans and didn't even seem to notice I was here. He was looking down at his hands which I noticed were covered in dried blood. my heart jumped as I crossed over and bent down in front of him, taking his hand in mine beginning to inspect it. He still hadn't said a word and wouldn't look at me. I sighed,

"what happened?"

"punched a wall" he muttered.

I waited for him to look at me which didn't happen. I sighed and reached into my bag looking for my first aide kit I always kept. Thankfully it had some bandages in it. Bending back down, I took his hand in mine and started cleaning up the blood.

"why?" I asked.

he shrugged, "felt right at the time"

I shook my head and finished wrapping up his hand. Once I was done, I held onto it feeling the overwhelming feeling of warmth that he always gave me. Not a word was said of between the two of us.

"mingus is worried about you" I whispered.

he once again didn't say anything, wouldn't even look at me.

"You're dying" he finally stated.

"I know" I sighed.

"Don't you even care?" he spat finally looking at me.

His eyes seemed to show some sort of anger and it took me back a bit, but I just shook my head, "I've accepted it....like you should"

"you're kidding me right?" he yelled standing up from the bench.

I stood up slowly facing him. I was going to let him completely get everything off his chest.

"You're dying! you won't be alive soon and you expect me to just accept that!" he yelled.

"this is why I didn't want to get close to you in the first place....none of that is important though. What is important is you have a life to live. A son that was scared to death when his dad didn't come home. A job that counts on you, fans, friends. You have people that care about you and were worried sick when you just disappeared." I said.

"listen to yourself mel! this isn't about me, it's about you! do you even care! you're dying! soon you won't be here! Soon I will wake up in a world where you don't exist! I won't be able to hear your laugh, see your smile, anything! You don't even seem to care!" he yelled.

"Norm..."I started to say but was cut off,

"No you don't! You don't care! Doctors can't do shit and you don't care you just sit there acting like its not a big deal!" he yelled.

"You think I don't care!? Are you serious! I do care! I'm terrified!" I blew up.

He just looked at me breathing heavily as I continue, "Is that what you wanted to here? That I'm scared? Well guess what I am! You don't know what it's like going to sleep wondering if you were even gonna wake up the next morning? I'm terrified of what Gwen is going to go through! I'm terrified that Mingus will hate me, but you know what I'm scared of the most?!" I screamed as tears fell down my cheeks.

He just glared at me.

"I'm terrified of how you make me feel. Whenever you're around, this electricity flows through me. Whenever you're not around it's like I cant breathe. The way I just want to tell you everything about my life and how I want your arms around me because that's the only time I really feel safe!" I yelled with tears streaming down my cheeks.

I was breathing heavily waiting for him to say anything, but he didn't. He just starred at me as I watched his eyes start to get watery.

"no one has ever looked at me the way you do and that made me so angry. Like god was playing some sick joke on me that now he FINALLY gives me someone that gives a damn about me just for me die in the end. Sure Death terrifies me, but that isn't what scares me the most." I said.

"What does?" he asked with his voice cracking.

I went to answer him, but it suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe. My breaths became more rapid and I started gasping for breath.

"Mel?" his voice cracked as he starred at me worriedly.

Quickly I ran to my bag on the table and sat down, grabbing my inhaler. Bringing it to my mouth I took 3 puffs and I started to be able to breathe again. I felt the bench weigh down next to me and an arm wrapped around my back. Looking out in the field, I let a few more tears slip down my cheeks as I tried to calm myself down.

"what scares me the most in this world, more than death...." I started to say but stopped.

I felt his eyes starring at me intently which only made me more nervous. Running a hand through my hair, I sighed and said, "is how in love with you I truly am"

He remained silent and a few more tears slipped down my cheeks as I continued, "And how I never want to lose you."

"You won't" he said hastily.

"I will and there's nothing we can do to stop it" I whispered.

"melody look at me" he said sternly.

When I refused, I felt his gentle hands on both sides of my face and he turned me so now I was starring into his eyes. Never have I seen those blue eyes hold so much emotion,

"I'm not going anywhere. I will stay here, right by your side. We will fight this...together."

"promise?" I asked with my voice cracking.

He wiped my tears with his eyes and said, "promise. I love you melody"

"I love you too" I whispered as he brought my lips to his and sealed his promise with the most passionate kiss we ever shared.



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