SillyNate's Vlogmas

Vlogmas Day 11: Christmas Party at Janya's

"Merry Christmas everyone. I love you all loads!" Tanya announces, as we're about to drink our shots. Abbs raises her half empty drink, as she's not doing shots. The fact that she's drinking at all is a big thing for her but she never drinks more than one or two drinks and never shots.

We down our shots and I suck on the orange slice.

"It's really quite a nice shot, love," I tell her. "Very Christmassy."

She leans in to peck my lips as to get a taste on what's left on my lips.

"Abbs!" I huff annoyed. "Now, I'll have to edit that part out."

"You tried to convince me to taste it and I did, don't doubt my methods!" Abbs says grinning as she leans back against the sofa.

We've been here for a while already as we were the first and only guests to arrive on time. There's loads of people here, many that are Tanya and Jim's friends that we don't know well and I know Abbs is feeling a bit on edge about it.

Most of the girls are wearing sequin dresses but for once Abbs didn't try to follow the trend. Instead, she's in a Christmas jumper and jeans and looks far more comfortable than she ever does in a dress. I'm happy she's not afraid to do this. I know it's mainly because this is Tanya's house and she knows she'll receive no judgement from Tan.

"Uh!" Abbs says and perks up all of the sudden. "They're putting Justin Bieber on downstairs. Let's go dance."

She pulls me up with her, following the flock of girls down the stairs.

"Since when are you a belieber, honey?" I ask, slightly confused.

"A what?" she asks. "I just like his new album. Never really liked his old stuff," she adds as she's pulling me along.

As many of the other girls, she's tossed her shoes and are now only wearing socks. As soon as the music starts playing she begins to sing along and swaying her body as she does. I laugh as I try to follow her made-up moves. She looks quite hilarious but it's utterly adorable.

After two songs, she's tired herself out and walks outside. I know it's not really the dancing that's the problem, being with huge groups of people drains her mentally and she constantly needs small breaks, even if she doesn't realise.

I follow her, not really remembering that I'm actually vlogging because it's such a second nature to me.

"Abbs?" I call as I see her back. She's admiring Jim and Tanya's snowman.

"This is so cute," she says. She feels my presence behind her and leans back on me. "Oh, you're still vlogging?"

"I'll turn it off..." I start to say but she interrupts me.

"No, hold on a second," she says and takes the camera from me and then stretches out her arms to get us both properly in shot.

"Hi guys, I just wanted to say to anyone watching, that it's okay to go to parties on your own terms. It's something I'm only really beginning to do recently. It's okay only to have no drinks at all or to drink as much as you'd like. It's okay to wear the skimpy dress that shows off your body or it's okay to wear a huge jumper. No one should judge you for you choices and if they are, you need new friends. I'm so happy I've finally found a place within myself to be comfortable with who I am and that the people around me support me. So many people complimented my jumper today because I look and feel comfortable. Because it's the real me."

With that she turns off the camera and leaves me speechless as she often does.