Why I Have To

Chapter 31

September 2015

Althea's POV

I knew who it was the moment I saw the silhouette of the person on the rooftop. I would know that silhouette anywhere.

My knees buckled when she faced my direction, looking for the sound that brought her to her senses. Good thing she hasn't seen me yet because I still don't know what to do.

Miggy was frantic now— recognizing the scent of his other owner, and I felt so weak and nauseous that I accidentally let go of his leash.

Damn it. There's no turning back now.

I moved a little closer to see her, she crouched down to pet Miggy and I witnessed her break down as she realizes who it was.

I walked closer,

and closer,

and closer.

She flinched as she heard my footsteps— and again, I saw her battle herself whether to look up or not.

She chose not to.

The sweet scent of vanilla is consuming my senses the closer I walk towards her.

Her.

Three years yet she still looked and smelled the same, it's as if she never left— as if I never left her. She's still the same and yet, everything is different.

With one final step, I smiled at her as she gazed upon me and said, "are you looking for this?"

She stared at me with her tear stained face— speechless. I wanted to hold her, I wanted to touch her, but I can't.

Not yet.

I come up here every Saturday night, just like we used to, and out of all the nights that I spent expecting her to be here, today was the day that I least expected her to be.

I know that she's been back and I know that she's read my journal, but I never heard from her. I thought she hasn't forgiven me and that she's finally over me— but she's here. Whatever her reason may be, I'm still glad to see her here.

Even if it's the last time.

I was brought out of my reverie when she spoke, "you really are keen on breaking promises."

"Huh?"

She stood up and pointed to the rusty case I'm holding and said, "we promised each other not to read that until we're both free."

"I never opened it," I paused. "Why are you looking for it then? Does it mean you're free?"

"Sort of... Yes... I don't really know... I'm about to find out," she mumbled.

"Why is it with you?" she added.

"Figured you'll cheat and read it ahead of me. I guess I'm right," she furrowed her eyebrows and I smirked at her. She's still adorable when I say something that pisses her off.

I miss seeing her pissed.

I miss waking up every morning to the sound of her heartbeat.

I miss waiting all day for our night kisses and deep talks until we fall asleep.

I miss her scrunched up nose whenever she's in deep thought.