Chapter 24: Distance

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Paul called when they arrived, as promised. I couldn't handle not talking to him for three weeks, so I told him to reverse the charges. I could afford it.

We made some small talk about the trip, but I could tell something was bothering him.

"What's wrong, Paul? You sound upset"

"Yes, well Stu's dead." I remembered Paul and the rest of the guys talking about him some. He used to be the bassist, but then he quit & Paul took over. I gathered that Paul hadn't always gotten along with him, but they had patched things up.

"That's terrible! What in the world happened?"

"A brain hemorrhage or something. I don't really know. Astrid said that he collapsed and was dead by the time he got to the hospital" Astrid, their friend from Hamburg who was dating Stu. I would be staying with her when I traveled to Hamburg. He had died a few days before and Astrid met the boys when they arrived and told them.

"I'm so sorry baby. How are you and everyone else taking it?"

"Well, I just feel like the biggest Jerk, because I was an ass to him half the time. John was closest to him. I know he's talking it hard, though he's not really showing it at the moment. He's off getting pissed with the rest. It's a shock, really."

"It sounds like you might need to go join them. I wish I was there with you. I don't like being so far from you with this happening." I wished I could hold him, to comfort him.

"I know I sound like a bloody fucking record, but I miss you. I wish school was over and you were here with me"

"I know, love. I wish it was over. It won't be long and I'll be there. I love you! Tell the guys I'm so sorry"

"I will. Love you too, baby" he said wearily, then hung up the phone.

The next weeks went by fairly fast as I had so much school work. Paul called daily, his spirits much improved from that first night. He was so busy; they were playing practically every night. We would often talk during the day after I was off school, but before he performed. One night he called me at 3 a.m.

" 'Ello, luv." His accent sounded especially thick tonight, even through my sleep addled mind.

"Paul, everything ok?"

"Absolutely. I've written you a song. It's a little ditty, you are so pretty" He then giggled for much longer than was normal. He sounded high as a kite! I knew he occasionally took uppers to stay awake. He must have taken some that night.

"Well, why don't you play that song for me?" Trying to get him back on track.

"I can't. I've lost me guitar." He said something else but is was muffled. Then "Ooh, George you seen my guitar. I need to play Anne my song." He was slurring his words.

"George? Paul can I talk to George?" Maybe he would make more sense.

"Ok, George? It's Anne. She wants to talk to you. Just talking, you understand She's mine"

There was a little shuffling then George's deeper sounding voice said "Hullo, Anne?"

"Hello, George. I'm thinking my boyfriend's drunk and high at the moment"

"Yes, luv. I believe he is. Don't worry he's being a good boy; he just drank a little too much tonight."

"I can tell. Will you do me a favor and make sure he's all right tonight?" I said knowing he would. He was a good friend to us both.

"Anything for you, but I was going to anyway. That's why I came to find him" George said.

"Thank you Georgie. I appreciate it. I'm not sure Paul will remember this conversation; so can you tell him goodbye for me?"

"Will do. Bye, Anne"

"Bye, George. You're the best!"

Paul called back that afternoon apologizing profusely.

"Don't worry about it, babe. You know you can call me anytime. Plus, now I really need to hear that song you wrote for me" I couldn't resist teasing him about his drunk dialing.

"What song was that?" He asked, confused.

"The one you told me about this morning"

"I don't even remember calling you! George had to tell me about it. Well, I haven't written you a song exactly but definitely inspired by you. Not finished yet, though"

"Really? I can't wait to hear it"

"Well, you hurry over here & I'll try to finish it"

"It's a deal"

A week later I received a letter from him. I wasn't expecting one especially since I talk to him every night. It read:

My Dearest Anne,

You told me how much my last letter meant to you while I was away, so I thought I'd write you another.

Yesterday, we took a walk to the park. As we were walking back, I saw a girl with long red hair. At first, I only saw her out of the corner of my eye. For an instant, I thought she was you, and I almost called out to her. When I did get a good look at her, it definitely wasn't you. A very poor imitation. Her hair was long and red, but not near the same color as yours and hers seemed dull in contrast. I know I sometimes complain about your hair, like how it seems to be everywhere. My clothes, the bath. But, I love it I really do! The way it smells and the way it brushes my cheeks while I am holding you. If it suddenly fell out, I would love you the same. Although, I truly hope it doesn't!

Don't worry, this letter isn't all an ode to your hair. I could go into the other parts of your body, but this is a love letter & I don't want to make it dirty. Very hard, because I'm missing you. Whoops, okay maybe only a little dirty.

I love you for so many things, but mostly it's the way you make me feel. I feel like I could tell you anything and it would be all right. You would still love me the same. You are home to me and If you weren't around I would be lost.

So hurry up and come see me so I can play you that song I wrote. There is a clue to the title in this letter, but you will have to wait to find out when you get here.

I love you! I miss you! Please hurry!

Love,

Paul

P.S.: I love you

I didn't think it was possible to miss him more, but that letter did the trick. I finished my final exams on May 3rd. The next day Cyn and I were off to Hamburg. The trip was long, but very exciting. I had never been to Germany, so I was looking forward to that. Plus, I would be there with Paul.

As the train pulled into the station, Cyn and I spotted John & Paul. My heart leapt when I saw that dark shiny head of hair, then those eyes staring back at me.

Cyn and I gathered our things in record time, and exited the train. I ran toward Paul and dropped my things before his feet. Then I was in his arms, and we were kissing. Being away from him was torture, but seeing the way he looked at me after such a long time apart, it was almost worth it. I know the same look was reflected in my eyes. We were where we were meant to be, together.



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