Chapter 13

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I've been anxious for some times now! Why the hell did I choose tonight to bring Kristy out on a date? Why not this weekend or at least save it for tomorrow! That moment when I thought it was so smooth of me in inviting her out but this is actually can be quite a horrible idea!

I mean yeah I did plan something on my mind while imagining what should I do IF I EVER have an awesome date with Kristy, like I really want her to experience the most awesome first date ever, which permits me to have the second date and so on! I still have like 10 days more to earn the title to become her real girlfriend, that IF she ever returns the same feeling as mine.

*sigh*

I don't know!

Sometimes I think she feels the same way about me, like maybe she loves me more than just a best friend. Like how the way I saw her behaviour towards Candice today at school. That was some kind of jealousy right? It must be! Because I used to feel the exactly same way whenever she's with her boyfriends before.

But, she will never understand any of that because... I don't know! It's complicated..!

Jason Mraz said we will be lucky to fall in love with our best friend. But he didn't exactly stated the truth! Sometimes I feel like fall for your best friend sucks! Like my situation now, I still feel clueless when it comes to analyze her feelings.

It might be jealousy, it might be just part of my wiiiiiildest dream uhhh-ahhh...

Ohhh gosh! I'm just a young teenager but currently having some midlife crisis!

Back to the date planning! I might know what to do for her. Nothing grand or whatsoever, but maybe I can show her the best date of her life. At least that's what I thought!

Come on Xandra, she is your 8 years of best friend, you should know what and how to make her happy! So, I guess, this is it!

........................................................

(Date night)

Kristen POV

Xandra asked me to meet her at the playground we used to play when we were kids. I've been wondering why didn't she just come to my house like usual, but yeahhh it's her idea so I might just as well follow it.

So here I am, in the playground, just about 5 minutes walking distance from my house. Sometimes we still come here fooling around. Whether we'll just watch the kids playing and chasing around or Xandra will ask me to sit on the swing and insisted to push me everytime. Or sometimes she'll just playing with some kids there. That girl never really grow up! But she's my girl soooo...

MY GIRL??

Yeahhh guess I can slowly get used to that. Still need some times to figure out myself. That time when Xandra used to ask me why am I such a homophobic? To be honest, I don't think I am! I don't know. Living with your religious grandmother kinda rubbed you in that way. I've been seeing how her expression will change to some kind of disgust whenever we saw any same sex couples kissing in the middle of the street, or besides the store or anywhere! Hell, she even looked at some couples who just holding hands happily talking to each other in that exact disgust way! I've been living with her since I was a kid until I moved here and met Xandra and her family. My mom and I will visit her sometimes and whenever I was there, she's still the same homophobic grandmother. But she still my abuela...

Now, as I've grown up, my perception towards other people is changing as well. I might be look at some gay couples in our school with such a weird expresion sometimes.

Weird? Yeahhh.. Because I don't really know how to describe my feeling whenever I look at those couples actually. They seem happy, but I still feel weird! That abuela of mine really has such a huge impact on me!..

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