Forsaken Tenderness

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You were devastated; heart broken. You felt your hands shake and your stomach hurl.
All you wanted was for the ground to open up and swallow you whole. You had never known a heart ache like this, you felt like your heart has been torn from your chest.

"You need to what?" you asked Patrick, trying to be as calm as you could.
"Sugar I am so so sorry, I love you, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life -" you cut him off
"You're already married?!" your voice croaked as your bottom lip trembled and a single tear rolled down your face. Patrick was still holding onto your hands, making sure to not let go.
"I wasn't meant to be! I thought I wasn't until now, thats why I was gone so long" he pleaded with you, never disconnecting his eyes from yours. "She never sent the papers, she was meant to."
You pulled one hand away from Patrick's tight grip, and wiped the flowing tears from your cheek.
"I went to the lawyers office." he began to tell you "They've said it will take 6 months to finalise. But thats it now, all that needed to be done has." he sighed as he looked down, head hanging in shame.

"I dont know what you want me to say, Patrick" you paused. "None of this is ok"
He nodded his head, still looking down away from you. "I know" he mumbled. "I just..." he began. "I just hope you still love me, and still want to marry me" he weeped, raising his head to finally face you once more. His eyes were red and puffy from slight tears. He was as upset as you were, and despite how angry you were you wanted to ease him. You rubbed the side of his hand, fingers still entwined.
"Of course I still love you. And of course I still want to marry you. I'm just angry and upset right now, I can't process this. I need to be alone and think" you explained, nodding your head still in shock and awe.
"I understand." he told you as he kissed the side of your hand.
You stood up, and rubbed his shoulder as you walked past, not looking back like you usually would. You were in so much pain you couldnt muster the lust to kiss or cuddle him goodbye.
You headed for the bedroom to be alone with your thoughts, and come to terms with what he confessed to you. Your head hit the pillow as a flood of tears came pouring from your eyes.


*Patrick's POV*

I feel so disgusted with myself right now.
I hope she knows what she means to me; I can't lose her, I love her more than words can say.
*Sigh*
I hope she isnt too distraught up there. I'll bring her up some food in an hour or so, check that she's ok and can stand to see me.
I want to blame Pete cus that would be the easiest thing to do right now, but he's right. It needed to be sorted, and (Y/N) needed to know. I should probably tell Pete actually.... I opened the text box on my phone.

"Hey Pete. Got them signed and sent, 6 months to fix. Told (Y/N), she's really upset :( shes upstairs alone for a while. This feeling sucks :( "

I ruffled my fingers through my hair and turned on the TV to kill time.
Everything that was on reminded me of (Y/N). Every single channel. I just hope she is ok, I hate that I have caused her to feel this way. I will never hurt her ever again.


 

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