GIRL MISSING - RUBY ROSE

Chapter 15

I woke up groggily. I had the worst nights sleep ever. I had more than one nightmare last night, I thought I'd never get a decent sleep. I turned on my side and looked at the clock. It read 2.38pm woah that was late for me.  Odly I didn't care. I didn't ever want to leave my bed. I checked my phone and had no new messages from Ruby. I felt sad.

For the whole day I only got out of bed to go pee or to get food. I didn't know what was up with me. It was 9pm and had still no text from Ruby. I decided to text her asking how her day went. I was waiting impatiently for a reply but it never seemed to come.

I laid down for a while, bringing back memories of the two years of being in a tiny, dark room, laying on a crusty old bed with literal bars over the windows. I remember the foul smell so well. And then I remembered my friends. I remembered how happy I was with them. And now they all have lives that don't concern me now, and I thought of my dad. How he was probably happy that I was gone. You see when I was born he was no where near ready to have a child. This was probably his way out and I ruined it by coming back. My mind went to my mother. I knew she cared about me in her own way. But I think secretly she liked the attention she got from people because of my disappearance.

I let myself cry. It felt good to cry. I hadn't cried in so long. My body was jolting with every sob. I left wet marks on my pillow. I wish everything could go back to the way they were before, only I wish Ruby was included. My mind went back to Ruby and I looked at my phone, still no new messages. She hadn't replied to my last few messages or calls.

I plopped down back on my bed and cried into my pillow some more. I'm glad my parents weren't hear to see this. My dad probably would tell me to grow up and my mother would shower me with affection till I was sick of it. I was tired of crying so much and a headache was starting to form.

After a few more hours I eventually fell asleep.

I woke up the next morning feeling like hell. Again I woke up late. 3.05 this time though. I hadn't left the house for over 24 hours and I had no intention of breaking out of that any time soon. I checked my phone again hoping to see a message from Ruby because maybe that message could pull me out of this slump but there was none from her. Just my mum. Guess she finally gave in.

"How r u holding up?" My mum texted I cringed at her typing like a 10 year old on msn.

I lied.

"Good thank you. Yaz and Apryl are coming over later. It will be fun."

I felt bad lying but the only reason I was here and not at home, was because I lied. So I might as well keep it up.

Lying was bad, I know but I didn't want her to worry about me. If she knew I hadn't been eating properly and hadn't left my house in so long she would go ballistic.

She would also go ballistic if she found out my therapist actually advised I stayed at home for a while longer. Whoops. Thinking of that, I had a session today but I wasn't going to it. I also had skipped out on some of my medication.

I knew I wasn't feeling down because of my meds. I was down because I felt alone. Meds weren't going to make me feel alone. I knew that was really bad what I was doing but I didn't care at this point. I hadn't felt this sad in a while.

I just wanted Ruby to come back. She would instantly make me feel better.

Throughout the day I kept checking my phone, getting anxious every time I looked and didn't get a message back.

My mind went to the worst possible scenario. Maybe she found someone better and was purposely ignoring me. That put me in a worse mood.

I mean we weren't official and a modelling shoot is filled with loads of attractive people maybe she met someone else.

-----

It had been 6 days since Ruby first left. Today was the first day I was leaving my house. I needed to go and get some food. I looked rough but I didn't care.

The past few days had consisted of me sleeping, watching Netflix, crying, staring at my phone waiting for Ruby to reply to me. I was so done now though. It was evident she doesn't want to talk to me. But she could've just said. I don't deserve that.

I walked around the grocery store and I bumped into my friend Apryl. She looked the exact same. She almost dropped her basket when she saw me. She came running over.
Our talk was pretty brief but she asked how I was doing and I lied.

"I'll have to come visit you soon! We can have a catch up I think we need it." I choked out a humourless chuckle.

"Yeah I think we do. I'll see you soon. Goodbye!" I said before giving her a hug and carrying on with my shopping.

I walked down the veg isle and I heard a familiar Australian voice.

I turned around and so did she at the same time.

I smiled awkwardly after seeing her with some really pretty blonde. She stopped mid laughter and started walking towards me.

Oh no. I thought to myself. This is embarrassing I look rough and her new girl toy is probably thinking I'm a piece of trash.

"Hey." I managed to say even though it came out really squeaky.

"Hey, I was just about to pop round yours."

"Oh" was all I managed to say.

I wonder how long she had been back for and why she didn't tell me or answer my texts or calls.

I started playing with my hands feeling awkward. I could feel the tension rise between the three of us.

"I really have to go, I'm off to meet Yazmin." I lied. Again. This was getting into a bad habit.

I didn't want to seem lame like I had been waiting for her return even though, that's exactly what I did.

"Okay, I'll catch up with you later."

I just nodded and walked away, I looked behind me and I saw them walking and laughing the opposite direction.

I let out a sigh and paid for my items and walked out as fast as I could.

I got home and didn't even bother putting the groceries away. I climbed into bed and cried.