Sherlock One-Shots and Preferences

Sherlock - What Have I Done?

For @staryhorizons

No ones POV:

Y/N dragged her feet along the fresh spring grass with solemn disparity in her heart, just like everyday. Barely anyone came to this cemetery unless it was a burial, 'how selfish of people' she thought as all the gravestones were either bare or had dead flowers slumped against them like someone had just threw them there and walked away.

Or rather Y/N was over thinking things...maybe she was the one who came too much. She came everyday to this cemetery, through snow or rain, through bitter cold or sizzling heat. And everyday she brought a single red rose to weave around the other hundreds she had brought making almost a halo of roses around a single gravestone. She did that to show love that she never had the chance to present to Sherlock whilst he was still alive.

So at his gravestone, Y/N collapsed to her knees and weaved the rose in after greeting Sherlock, or rather the stone. Her shaky fingers reached into her bag and retrieved a cloth in which she wiped the stone off so it was sparkling. Y/N eyes became glossy with tears. Though his death was two years ago it felt like she had just lost him yesterday, or rather everyday.

Y/N blinked slowly, her eyelids becoming heavy with fatigue. She laid her head down and curled her body up into a ball. Though she didn't know it, Y/N had made a bed of roses for herself, each one weaved together perfectly so the buds frame her body. Single tears slipped from her eyes as the sleeping pills took her life away under the shade of the old oak tree beside her one true love's empty grave.

Sherlock's POV:

"Mycroft." I greet my brother. His assistant hands me a razor and I position myself in front of the installed sink in his makeshift office. I pat my disgustingly long stubble with water and coat it with shaving cream.

"Can't keep stubble for a day I see." Mycroft points out and I grumble to myself. "I like to be clean shaven you know that brother."

"Trying to impress someone?"

"Hm?"

"Don't avoid the question Sherlock, you're clearly trying to make yourself fancy for someone." Mycroft tapped away on his computer.

I stayed silent. I was tense because Mycroft had just watched me be beaten  by a Russian police officer; though he was clearly having an affair and I was the first criminal he had caught in years, but yet he teases me about impressing someone?!

I guess Mycroft still has some intellect left, because though I'd not like to admit it, I've been stepping my game up to catch the attention of a certain person.

I give Mycroft a sly angered look and continue to shave.

"At least I have someone to impress." I thought my cheeky remark would crack a smile on his face, but instead his lips curled into a frown, a sad one at that.

"Is it Y/N Sherlock?" Mycrofts voice was flat, emotionless yet it told me so much. I immediately knew something was wrong but I couldn't distinguish what.

I turned to Mycroft. His eyes dulled vigourously and he motioned for me to take a seat.

"What's wrong?" My lips didn't correspond with my brain, they ended saying what I thought immediately.

"Take a seat Sherlock."

"No."

"Take a se-"

"I'm not taking a bloody seat until you tell me what's wrong!" My sudden burst of anger silenced my brother. His surprised features slowly curled into an angered frown, and he got up and leaned on his desk with his fists.

"Y/N's dead Sherlock! For two months she's been gone so there's no reason to get spic-and-spanny when the only person who ever cared for you beside John is dead!"

I was speechless, my mind was spinning. Mycroft isn't showing any signs of lying, but it can't be. I rush to get my coat and don't even bother to button up the rest of my shirt. I snatch my jacket from Mycrofts assistance's hands and almost break the door trying to open it. I turn back to him, I know my voice is unsteady but I swallow hard.

"You're wrong." I spit, and fly out of the room, my heavy footfalls being the only thing I could hear.

I rush into a taxi and yell at the private driver to take me home. When we get there I don't even slam the door shut, I just pound on the door for someone to let me in. I had already told John and Mrs. Hudson, but today I was going to tell Y/N, I'd hope she would've taken it well. 'What are you saying Sherlock, of course she's not going to take it well, she's not going to take it at all. She's dead.' My inner conscious comes out to play, mocking me. I growl in anger and yell for Mrs. Hudson to open the door.

She finally opens the door and I gently push her aside. "Where's Y/N?" I grab the sides of her arms so she's looking right at me. My eyes scan every facial feature, she seems to be saddening by the second.

"WHERE'S Y/N?" I yell, my voice cracking from its unsteadiness. She looks down, and whispered. "We didn't want to tell you yet."

I let go of Mrs. Hudson and rush upstairs. "NO, NO, NO, NO!" I yell over and over again.

I opened the flat door and slammed it shut, then tangled my fingers into my hair and pulled. My eyes started to sting and a lump grew significantly fast in my throat.

I yelled angrily and slammed my fists down on my now clean desk. A Manila coloured envelope jumped in the process, making me stop in my tracks and grab it with my shaking hands.

The back read nothing, but the front was printed neatly in Y/N's handwriting.

To anyone who loved me~

My nimble fingers opened the un sealed envelope and I took out the folded paper and began to read.

To whoever is reading this whether it be John, Mrs. Hudson, or my family, I'd like to say sorry. I'm selfish for taking my life away from yours but I just couldn't take it anymore. I lost the person I truly loved in the whole wide world. The one that made me feel important, and without him I felt like nothing. Sherlock Holmes. When he fell, I fell too; I fell into an endless pit of misery. Nothing made me happy anymore, nothing made me smile like he did. Though he never got to know how much I was in love with him, now I might finally be with him. Know that I loved you who are reading this and to please carry on your life being happy and don't let my tragedy be yours. Live your life with a smile on your face because I would've wanted that for you.

Sincerely,

Y/N Y/L/N

The paper slips through my fingers and i can feel hot tears slipping down my cheeks. I couldn't hold back this time, I just sobbed and sobbed constantly repeating the words "What have I done?"

"What have I done?"

"What have I done?"

Hello peeps! Happy first day of spring! This was made to be sad, the person requesting it asked for it to be sad so don't be all sour. Please vote and comment.

-CW