All This Time

Chapter 6

"El...I can't do this," I say before he even gets the chance to kiss me. I cross my arms.

"Liv, I understand, but you have to trust me. I'm not just going to walk out and leave. That's never going to happen again. Olivia, I love you. I wou-" before he could finish what he was saying, his phone started ringing. He looked down at it.

"Excuse me, I have to take this," he said as he walked off. I had no clue what he was saying or who he was talking to. Then, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see Brian.

"What do you want?" I ask, getting quite frustrated that he won't leave me alone for 10 minutes.

"Liv, I want you. I know I was a jerk but c'mon, everyone deserves a second chance. You have to make choices and take risks," he says to me, pleading.

"You know what?" I said as I took a pause. "You're right," I said to him. His face filled with excitement and he was totally shocked.

"What?" he said, sounding confused.

"I said you're right," I told him.

"Liv...thank you so much," he said to me.

"No...thank you. Thank you for making me realize that I do need to make choices and take risks. That everyone does deserve a second chance...even if that means risking getting hurt again," I say to him.

"Liv I apologize for the past, I do. Can we maybe start over?" he said. I shook my head.

"No, we can't," I said with a slight smile.

"But...?" he questioned, his emotions quickly changing.

"I wasn't talking about you, Brian. The love of my life has been right in my face all along. I need to lighten up and give him a chance...whether that means getting hurt or not," I say as I look over at Elliot who had just hung up the phone and put his phone back into his pocket.

"Oh...you mean Elliot," Brian said. His voice changed. "I wish you the best, Olivia," Brian said as he walked off.

"What was that about?" Elliot asked, raising his eyebrows and turning his head towards Brian.

"Nothing..." I said. "Brian just made me realize that the love of my life has been here all along. He deserves a second chance. Whether I get hurt or not. So, I need to go get him...if that's okay with you?" I asked Elliot. His eyes were full of hurt.

"Uh..." he began as he coughed. "Yeah. Yeah of course. I'll see you later," he said as he turned to walk off.

"Elliot, one more thing," I said. He turned around.

"Yeah?" he asked. A tear went down his face.

"I meant you. I was talking about you," I said as I looked down at my feet then back up again.

"Liv, you scared the living heck out of me," he said and I laughed.

"Goal accomplished," I said with a smile.

"Come here," he said and I ran and jumped into his arms. I closed my eyes, tight, and cried.

"I'm sorry I was being such a b-" I started but he cut me off. He let me down and we stood there.

"Olivia, don't. You did no such thing. I'm sorry I left. I should've told you. I should've called or texted you...something. Three years with no communication? That's ridiculous on my part," he said.

"I agree," I said as I laughed.

"You're gonna pay for that, Benson," he said to me.

"Try me, Stabler," I said as I ran off into the building and into my apartment...Elliot right behind me. He grabbed my waist. We both started laughing.

"You're pretty fast, Benson," he said while smiling.

"You're not so bad yourself, Stabler," I said as I chuckled.

He leaned in to kiss me. His lips almost met mine. I stopped him by putting my hands on his chest and looking away.

"El...I need time. Okay? I'm giving you a second chance so don't believe that I don't want this...I just need a bit," I said with disappointment.

"Hey, I get it. No pressure," he said. I smiled at him, thanking him for understanding. I've said that so many times...I just need time.

"Can I ask who you were on the phone with earlier?" I asked him.

"Uh...yeah, it was Kathy. She started with all this apology crap and how she never really wanted to get a divorce. Stupid things, to be honest," he said to me.

"Oh," I said.

"Liv don't worry. Okay?" he said.

"Yeah," was all I managed to get out.

"It was nothing," he said.

"Elliot, I mean how can I even compete with her? You were her husband for so long. That was your wife. You have 5 kids together. I mean you two have a life and all we have is...chemistry. How can we be sure that we are gonna end up happy?" I said to him.

"So what, Olivia? Take risks. God, Olivia you cross her out on so many levels. You are gorgeous, smart, funny, brave, kind-hearted. You are one of the greatest people I know. You are the greatest person I know. You've been through hell and back and I know I wasn't here for three years but I know you Olivia. You're strong. You get through and I love you with everything I've got. God, do I love you. Words aren't enough to explain how much you mean to me. I can't lose you. Not now. You are my everything. My stability. You keep me sane. Without you, I'm just a...man with no hope. I have nothing without you. I don't care if I have to stand here and pour my heart out to you. I will always love you. No matter what. You can push me away as much as you want to, but guess what? I'm always going to be right here when you need me. Now just accept it. I will wait. Take as much time as you need. I'll be here, I promise you that. Kathy doesn't even compare to you, Olivia. Okay?" he said as he put his hand on the side of my face and I just nodded. I knew he was serious because he said 'Olivia'. I know he means every word of that.

"Okay," I said to him. I put my hand on top of his and a tear rolled down my face.