All This Time

Chapter 8

We pulled into my apartment and Elliot walked me up. I hated him seeing me cry, so I was mad at this point. Especially him seeing me in this state in three years.

I didn't really want him to see me cry. I wanted him to think I was fine...although I knew he didn't think that. He knew how much he hurt me. I turned to face him after I unlocked my door.

"I had a good time tonight, Liv," he said to me as he stood outside my doorway.

"Yeah. Me too," I said...kind of annoyed.

"Listen, I don't know what I did...but I'm sorry. I shouldn't have requested for them to play that song," he told me.

"You're right about that," I said as I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms.

"Liv, I'm sorry. Why are you so upset?" he said very sincerely.

"I didn't want you to see me cry, okay?!" I yelled back at him and slammed the door in his face. I put my back against the door and cried.

About 3 minutes of hearing me cry he asked me to open the door...so, I did.

"What?" I said very softly.

"I'm sorry. If I would've known this was gonna make you upset...I never would've asked for that song to be played," he said to me as he looked at me with certainty.

"I know, El. I'm sorry for crying. I know you meant the best. It's just that song..." I said as I looked up and held tears back.

"I know, Liv. I get it," he said as he took me in his arms.

"El?" I say.

"Yeah?" he replied back as he let out of the hug.

"Do you think that we'll ever be...us...again? Like...back to normal?" I asked as a tear fell down my face. Elliot put his hands on my face.

"Olivia...of course. Time is all we need, okay?" he said as I simply shook my head. He wiped my tears and gave me a hug goodnight.

He was walking off and I just wanted him to stay, but I knew I couldn't be so vulnerable. But I picked up my phone before he reached the end of the hallway and texted him 'hey'.

He looked back and laughed a little and I closed the door. 'Hello' is what he texted back and I asked him to call me and he said of course.

I answered the phone as soon as it began to ring.

"Well, that was quick," he said as he laughed.

"Stop, you're killing me," I said in a pouting voice.

"What did I do?" he said as he laughed.

"Your just talking...I miss your voice already," I said.

The truth is...I did. I missed him already although I don't know if I should or not. Is it wrong to miss him?

"Aww poor baby," he said as he mimicked me.

"Not funny," I said as I laughed. "Can we FaceTime?" I asked him.

"Why?" he said back.

"Because I wanna see your face," I said as I smiled to myself.

"Once again...why?" he inquired.

"Because I guess I miss you," I said as I laughed.

"Fine..." he said as he laughed and we hung up. I couldn't stop smiling at myself.

'What kind of idiot are you, Olivia?' I said to myself. I let him right back in again...but it's hard not to trust someone you've known for so long. Then, his FaceTime call came in. I immediately connected the call.

"Hi," I said as I climbed into bed and propped myself up on one arm.

"Hey," he said, getting into the same position in his bed as I was in mine. I was just staring at him. "Liv, you okay?" he asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah," I said as I smiled.

"What's up with the smile?" he asked.

"You," I said. He smiled.

"What about me?" he had this smirk on his face.

"Everything. You know how hard it is to force myself to take time to gain your trust? Well...let's just say it's not all that easy," I said to him as I give him a small smile and just look at him. Everything about him made me feel safe. I felt as if he needed to be with me, but it's...complicated.

"Is everything...okay?" he asked me as he repositioned his arm.

"Yeah...I mean, I guess," I said as I took a pause. "It was hard without you, but now that you're back it's even harder. I felt like I was broken without you and I finally got a little better. When I thought about you I just wanted to scream and cry...and I just didn't know how to cope with it all. And finally, just when I thought I was better, here you are. That...hurt me. I mean I'm glad you're back, El...I really am. It's just a lot to take in. And the truth is...no matter how much better I thought I was getting...I was never really fine at all," I told him.

I think I finally expressed my feelings as I should've without getting so infuriated. I just told him the truth. I was on the verge of tears, but I waited for his response. He sat in silence for a bit...then finally spoke up.

"Liv...I get it. You have every right to feel the way you feel. Don't ever think that I'm gonna leave you again, because I'm not. I know I get mad sometimes, but I'm not leaving you okay? That's not gonna happen. Olivia, I love you. You mean the world to me and you are my number 1," he said to me and a tear went down my face.

"What about your kids...Kathy?" I asked him.

"My kids...hate me...really. Eli doesn't even know who I am and the other 4 think I was screwing you while Kathy and I were still together. They want nothing to do with me so it's practically like I have no kids. I love them so much...they will always be my kids, but I know they will never talk to me so...number 1 okay? Liv, you're all I've got," he said and by this point I couldn't help but cry. "Don't cry...it's okay, Liv," he said and I nodded and tried to stop crying. When I finally calmed down enough, I wiped the remaining tears and spoke up.

"El..." I say very quietly, but he heard me.

"Yeah, Liv?" he asked back and I hesitantly began to speak.

A/N~ So, what is she gonna say to him? What do you guys think? Comment below and let me know! Thanks for reading, guys! I love you all!