Empire // h.s. au

Good Terms

Samantha Anderson

Confronting Luke was going to be difficult. Christmas had passed and I had no reason to stay with him. Nothing held me to him. My affection was long gone. My love had left me. I couldn't love someone who had loved me. 

I was a hypocrite. I knew that. I know it seemed that I was ready to throw in the towel because of his cheating, but I think these feelings had been present long before that. The end of our relationship had been present long before two days ago. 

As I reflected on our relationship, my eyes stared at my phone. Willing a call from that one man I wanted dearly. He had consumed me since dinner. His gaze. That singular gaze that had changed it all for me. The way he had looked at me towards the end of the night. 

I couldn't handle it. It was a look he'd never used before. Something so different than I'd ever experienced with him. 

I felt as if he said something with it. But I couldn't put my finger on what it was. 

Riley waltzed into the kitchen as I sipped on coffee and looked outside. Snow was falling and New York looked picturesque. 

"Hey sis," she said, reaching into a cabinet and snagging a mug. She poured herself coffee, drinking it. 

"You need to move out, now." 

"Well good morning to you too," she rolled her eyes. "What's your deal?"

"What the hell do you think is my deal?"

She crossed her arms over her chest. She, as usual, was wearing a tight long sleeve shirt and yoga pants. Her blonde hair fell around her boobs, her face was make-up less. She had always been the pretty one. But I didn't care about that.

Her personality was hideous and I was done letting her walk all over me.

"Samantha, grow up. He's just doing to you what you did to him. I finally get why you stayed with him all those years," she laughed, a snarky smirk evident on her face.

"How dare you?" I snapped, standing up quickly and allowing the chair to clatter to the ground.

We stared at one another, over 20 years worth of anger and resentment flowing between us. Too many times she'd betrayed me. Too many times I'd betrayed her. My gaze hardened as her smirk increased and her gaze turned to the person behind me.

Luke stood, his lips chapped and his body covered in a sweatshirt. He looked between Riley and I, his chest moved up and down, and you could practically see his heart racing, "So it's happening."

"Just tell me why," I screeched, my voice raw. My pent up emotion pouring into my voice. I was so beyond angry. I was hurt and tired and lovesick. All I wanted was for one person to love me and he couldn't. He wasn't capable of that. 

I had lost Luke long ago. But I needed to know. Why my sister? How could he do that to me? To my family? 

"I can tell you why," Riley said, slithering past me and falling into Luke, her long, thin arms tangling around his neck. "Because he found you unsatisfying." 

"Riley, shut up and go to your room. Let me talk to Samantha by myself, please. We both deserve that."

He deserved nothing, but I refused to voice that. Riley looked taken aback by his powerful words, but did as he said, walking into her room.

Luke quietly sat across from me, crossing his arms and letting them sit on the counter. We stared at each other, neither of us sure what to say. 

"Tell me," I breathed, my eyes watering and my mouth dry. 

"It started when you left for Paris. I just, I kinda lost it. I was out with friends and I came home and she was here. You weren't. She just, was there. We hooked up. That next morning I was gone and going after you. Then, we got engaged. Nothing happened for awhile, but one night she just, she came onto me and I didn't really say no. From there on, we continued to hook up while you're gone." 

"Why didn't you tell me in Paris? I was honest with you," I said, shaking my head and letting the tears fall.

"Because I was still in denial about it."

I grabbed my hand in my lap and pulled on my ring finger. I slipped off the ring he had given me. My eyes stared at it as I gently placed it on the countertop. 

"We were done a long time ago, weren't we?" he said, grabbing my hand as it moved away. Our eyes met and the love I had once felt for him, sparked. It was that feeling of loving somebody, but knowing you were no longer right for each other. I knew, now, that I would be lying if I said I didn't love him anymore. Because I always would. No matter what. He was the first man I ever loved. 

But he was not the last. 

"I think so," I said to him, rubbing his hand. 

"You love him?" he asked, pursing his lips. 

I nodded my head and closed my eyes, tears streaming down my cheeks. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered, shaking my head. He looked away before standing up and coming around and wrapping his arms around me. I looked at him and opened my mouth. "I'll always love you, though, we just got a little screwed up towards the end."

"What do you want to do for living plans? I know this is an awful time for these questions, but I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"I'll go," I said to him. "I think it's for the best. " 

I left the room and went to the bedroom, packing most of my clothes. I'd come back for the rest of my things later, but for now I needed to get out and away. I planned to go to Aria's house. Harry's house was no option at this point. I couldn't do that to myself right now. 

I went into the bathroom and grabbed everything in sight that was mine. Forgetting about shampoo, but, luckily, remembering my make-up and face washes. I grabbed my Vera Bradley bag and stomped out of the room, tears falling easily down my cheeks. Luke was nowhere to be seen and I snagged my cell phone off the counter. 

I left the apartment and dialed Aria's number.

"Hello?" she called.

"It's all done. Everything. I have nothing." I sobbed into her phone, attempting to call a taxi while sobbing and standing on the street with everything I own. I had to look absolutely insane. 

"What the hell are you talking about?" she answered as a cab pulled up for me. I threw myself into the cab, shouting her address and returning the phone to my ear. "Hello, Sammy?"

"Fuck, sorry, I..." I felt my voice crack. "Luke and I. Done." 

"Oh my God, sweetie," she sighed. "You're coming here, right? Oh my." 

"I don't know what the hell to do."

Author's Note: HEY GUYS! I suck, I know. I've had a lot going on these past few weeks (my best friend just went into psychiatric care, so I've really been struggling). Finally found inspiration, though. Love you guys more than you know. ALS.