Awkward Introvert Stories

Makes me Want to Shout!

Hello!

I was walking my merry way down the street, minding my own business (some loud college girls talking behind me, as they often seem to do.)

When all of a sudden, a duck was sitting at the side of the side walk.

It asked me if I had any grapes... 

just kidding.

Thinking it would move away from the people, I ignored it and kept coming closer. I kid you not, I was only three feet away from this wild duck and it looked me right in the eye and had a lot of duck diarrhea right there.

Being an animal person, I knew that this bird must be incredibly ill to be so lethargic it won't move away from people (the ducks in my area are not tame / used to close up human proximity) and for it to be spouting a fountain out of its posterior. I decided it was best not to stress it out and kept going where I was going. I have a tiny apartment and therefore cannot care for a wild bird, not to mention nature is nature and sometimes its just best to let it do it's thing. 

The loud extroverts trailing behind me had a different idea about this sad little duck. One girl decided she wanted to catch it. She began to chase it while all the others watched and giggled. I couldn't help but warn them, I hate talking to strangers, but I hate even more people who treat animals without intelligence (I.E. not noticing this bird has clearly got something going on and would prefer to not be chased). 

"You might not want to touch it, it just had diarrhea!" I shouted across the plaza. What a great thing to say to random strangers! 

They all stared at me awkwardly and mumbled something about me spoiling their fun, but I hope that duck appreciates that I stopped its tormentors with awkward phrasing.

P.S. Please treat animals with care and respect. Not only does it help them, but it shows what a great person you are. If a wild animal allows you to get close, there is likely something wrong with it, don't touch it and please don't chase it! (Thats a great way to kill them even faster, it wastes valuable energy and stresses them (they think you want to eat them)).

Alright, I'll get off my little soap box.

(I didn't see the duck on my way back home, I'm assuming it was well enough to leave)

goodnight everybody!