The Bad Boy's Baby

Chapter 16: She Could Have Been So Much

Hey, y'all!

I know, I know, I said after 18th May, but I didn't have anything written plus I had to go pack for my short vacation. And then that place did not have wifi. So.

But the GOOD news is that I took all this time of freedom from the internet to write 4 chapters of TBBB which I will post together! Isn't that great?

I've planned out my chapters and the story will go on till chapter 21/22. And then there's an epilogue! WOOHOO!

Also, thank you so much for the 6.5K reads amd 205 votes! It felt really nice when I came back to this :D

OK, IMPORTANT: This is part one. As in, I have broken this part into two because it was getting so long even my note reminded me that it could not accommodate further words. There will be an abrupt ending in this chapter and I apologise for that.

Last chapter recap: Maddie confronts Colton about wanting to keep the baby and gets her heart broken. Also, dedicated to @LukeHemmingWifey14 for her votes on all of the chapters!

More on, later. Now, just enjoy! :P

******

*Colton*

I tried to keep my hands from shaking.

They wouldn't stop.

They hadn't stopped for the one week since I last spoke to Maddie.

Or more like, walked out on her, unable to bear the pain.

I knew it wasn't a disease; it was just some unknown, unconscious fear that I probably would know- if only I would allow myself to put a name to it.

I closed myself and took a deep breath, but there was a problem. Every time I did close my eyes, her face came in front of me- beautiful, warm brown eyes and that smile that twisted my heart and gut into something that I didn't know but nevertheless, pained me. And then that face changed to her crying as I walked away.

I felt like a coward. I wouldn't bail on her, but at that moment, being around her hurt. Seeing her hopeful face and pretty smiles were no help. And then what she said, it rang in my ears like some ever present prophecy of some sort (yeah, I know, I'm being completely dramatic, but excuse me while I try to deal with these strange feelings).

Don't even bother hiding how much you want me to keep the baby, Colton.

How did she guess though? I'd never hesitated or given any clues as to me feeling otherwise. But she somehow had. Was my face that readable? For fuck's sake, what was the point of being that "brooding dark prince" shit that all these girls in school went around calling me? I was supposed to be closed off. I am closed off. But I realised, as I had been all along, with Maddie, nothing was what I thought it would be.

The fact that Maddie also felt like keeping the child was a disaster. But what troubled me more was that she expected me to be OK with it. And I wasn't. I mean, she hadn't outright said she wanted to keep the child, but I had a feeling that if I wanted it, she would do just that.

And I can't do that to her. I can't ruin her life more. None of this was supposed to happen. And try as I might, I can't recollect what I did that night. Was I so drunk that I forgot protection? Or was being with her so fucking amazing that somehow that protection wasn't enough? What was it? 

But it happened, and life was a train wreck. Life had been a train wreck since Serena.

I winced. There it was; every time I thought Serena's name, it hit me like a fresh bullet wound. Isn't death supposed to make you go numb after sometime? Aren't we supposed to carry on and forget about it? Why then couldn't I do that? Why did my sister haunt me like the biggest regret of my life?