We leave the past behind (Hollywood undead love story)

Chapter 4-Can We Recover As A Team

George Ragan (Johnny 3 Tears) age 27

Jordon Terrell (Charlie Scene) age 23

Jorel Decker (J-Dog) age 24

Dylan Alvarez (Funny Man) age 22

Matthew Busek (Da Kurlzz) age 26

Aron Erlichman (Deuce) age 26

Catlin Wayne (Cat Voice) age 21

Catlin POV (Cat Voice)

Jay continued crying on my shoulder "there just let it all out" I mumbled rubbing his back as he grips onto my top, then I heard a slight knock turning my head without moving too much, I see the guys standing by the door looking worried, I mouthed "give us a few minutes" as they nodded and left the room, I looked back at Jay who hadn't notice the guys "Jay" I started as his sobs died down a bit "yeah" he mumbles "there something else I want to add" I said while he lifted his head "guys come in" I yelled as they come back and this time all of them walked into the room "Jay, do you see what I see?" I asked him as he looked at the guys then me, back to the guys then me again "yes......I see people who care about me" Jorel lets out a small smile as he let's go of me, all of the guys walk up to him and give him a group hug, I wanted them to talk it out, so I left the room to give them some space, I found a place to lie on the ground, I rested my head on the wall trying to catch my breathe, seeing Jorel in so much pain made me almost break down but I had to be strong for him "poor Jay" I mumbled rubbing my hands in my hair, the guys probably think I've gone home so I texted Dylan and told him I'm heading home, I just needed to clear my head and be alone.

(WARNING ATTEMPT TO SELFHARM)

I was home since it was probably 6 in the morning, I was sitting on the floor with my back to my bed "why am I feeling like this" I thought "maybe I had so much worry about it being my fault that the relief was really heavy on me and that I'm just worn down" another thought, I pulled my legs to my chest resting my chin on my knees "did I put so much worry that, I put myself in a panic attack" my thoughts were starting to get deeper "it's your fault" a voice said "he might have not hurt himself if you'd left him alone" the voice was repeating the same ones and different ones.

"just do it"

"it'll make everything better"

"the guys are better off without you"

"Dylan could do so much better"

"cut yourself"

"useless"

"burden"

All the voices stopped at once and I was brought back to reality, I blinked but then I found what was causing me to snap out of my thoughts, someone had been knocking on my door, I notice I was crying as well, I wiped my face and got up walking over to my door, I let out a sigh and opened the door......it was Dylan and he notice I was crying "hey....are you okay?" he asked as I nodded "you know I could have dropped you off" Dylan chuckles but somehow more tears fell out and I pulled Dylan to hug "woah babe what's wrong?" Dylan asks clearly confused but still returned the hug "I don't know" I mumbled as Dylan doesn't say anything, he just lays his head on top of mine "don't worry Cat, I'm here for you" Dylan said as I nodded, after a while we broke from the hug and I let Dylan into my house "is there something you want to tell me" Dylan offered as I nodded, he takes a seat on my bed and I joined him "it's just.....seeing Jay like that brought back some old thought, thoughts I used to have before I met you guys" I mumbled as Dylan listens, I still don't have the heart to tell him or any of the guys about my past "I used.....to have a sister" I mumbled as Dylan face expression went from straight to a small jaw drop like a gasp "and when she died....I was so depressed I had thoughts about self harming.....in the end I never did it but when I saw Jay like this.....it just brought it back" I said letting out a sigh, Dylan closes his mouth and gently held his hand on my cheek "I'm so sorry to hear" Dylan said as I moved my head to lean on his chest "is there anything I can do?" he asked holding me "just stay with me" I said "of course I will" Dylan said.