Spotlight #the2017Awards

Chapter 11

"Don't complicate it,goin native. (Running out at this moment,things will never be the same) -Never be the same by R5

I envied artists who could channel their pain like Taylor Swift or Florence and the Machine, I wish I could do that although I knew I could but I didn't know how. I took a deep breath hands poised over the piano, come on Marley remember Freshman year remember the beginnings and the feelings...

"Running around in circles day by day, hoping that every step we took you'd see me diff...rently"

Nope that's not right, I slammed my fists on the piano making it let out a high pitched screech. Despite how  I hated the lyrics I wrote them down anyway. Perhaps they will look a lot better later on.

"OKAY MARLEY YOU READY TO REHEARSE" I expected to see Phillip but instead saw Anna Patch."Miss Patch, I thought you were-"
"Phillip? Marley I am the swing judge remember? I wanted to see what your working on" she came and sat next to me at the piano. "So I know you are singing Never say never by the fray this week but what you were singing wasn't that, so what's wrong?"

I sighed heavily (feel like I've been doing that a lot these days) "I feel like I can't put all my pain into feelings, I can't word it, I can't seem to make it work" I leant onto the piano making it cry again. "Marley I won't tell you that you need to work through this because you know that but I will tell you that writing is hard and whatever you need to say will come out when you confront it , it doesn't work any other way" I felt the tears prick my eyes, god I hadn't cried about this in a long time and I wouldn't start now.

"What happened to you?" Anna asked putting her hand on my shoulder but I shook her off "that's no ones business" I knew I had hurt her feelings but she still removed her hands from my shoulders and made some pathetic excuse to leave and left me alone with the piano and notebook.

What am I going to do now?

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The week seemed to fly by and I barely noticed. The performances had just finished with our cover of the scripts 'never seen anything quite like you tonight' and my heartfelt Never Say Never by the Fray. It seemed to be a week full of emotion but Gravity didn't "connect" and were eliminated. Two groups were gone leaving Elsa and Sally alone to carry the torch for the groups.

Changing out of my constricting 'costume' ( skinny jeans and pink heeled boots hurt a lot) into my comfy ripped jeans and stripped shirt I was about to turn in for the day, maybe get some writing done.

"Hey Marley?" I turned to see Mason coming over looking equally as tired. "Oh hey" I began to pack up my handbag due its contents being thrown all over my dressing stall. "I was wondering ....well I am going out for a drink now and I was wondering do you want to come?"
"You and the band?"
"No just you and me I felt like we haven't spoken in awhile" my brain began its inner debate between friendly and date.

"Come on, I'll even spring for fries" he tried to catch my eye as I kept averting them, not from embarrassment but because Mason was wearing a tight navy t-shirt which outlines his muscles making me blush. "I don't know..." Before I could continue I felt Masons arms wrap around my waist and for a split second I thought he might kiss me.

Suddenly I felt him begin to tickle my sides and I couldn't help it but squeal with laughter. "Alright, alright I'll go" and then he stopped, revealing a goofy grin. "Alright alright come on" he grabbed my hand and once we were outside the Flo he lead me down a small street where the concrete path turned cobblestone and instead of streetlights fairy lights seemed to illuminate the street. "Where are we?" I asked him suspiciously "just a little nook that I found while exploring, I do live in New York you know"
"No I didn't know that"
"Yep I live in the East Village now, before I lived with my parents in Brooklyn" I was impressed I wish I could live in New York.

"Here we are" we stopped outside a small bar nested in the street (wedged between a coffee house and an Italian bistro). Leading me inside it was like one back home and also like the one we went to with the band. Leading me to a booth which was directly opposite the bar, Mason excused himself to buy drinks and as promised the fries. The bar was only occupied by ourselves, a single bartender and some other night owls while the music softly played.

"Here you go one lemonade for you and a beer for me" I was touched he remembered I didn't drink "fries? He answered by putting them down in between us. "So...have you started writing yet?" He asked me after a few minutes of idle chit chat. I had actually had writing a rough version of a song that was quite proud of, it only took me the rest of the week.

"Yeah I have..do you want to see?" Mason nodded and I rummaged in my bag for my song book and handed it to him. I had titled it 'Changes' for some reason but it seemed to do for now until I found a replacement. "Wow Marley these lyrics are really good." I blushed again because people didn't realise how hard song writing was until you had to do it yourself but that was writing in general.

We talked for awhile longer and we talked about music mostly (the boy likes the chain smokers, what's not to like?) and not much else (although I did find out he wanted to be a actor before learning to play guitar). "Oh wow look at the time" Mason showed me his phone where the time read 2:00am, had we really been talking for that long? "We should go and get some rest" we both went to leave the booth when I suddenly needed to go to the bathroom. "I need to use the ladies room, can you mind my bag?" He nodded and I handed it to him while running off to the bathroom.

Coming out I met Mason outside the bar, leaning against the wall and looking up at fairy lights. "Ready to go?" He asked, handing my bag back to me. "Only if you'll walk me home"

And he did just that and we listened to Ed Sheeran, the chain smokers and the script all the way home.

I hadn't felt like this in a long time